Rogues Wolf End~(McKayla Series Book 2)

Chapter 4~Test

Mckayla
~

Once I knew that Nina and Kaylee we're at a safe distance back home, I turned running back off to nowhere important. I couldn't keep doing this. Struggling to let Nina in. I would be the destruction of our relationship. I hated my human flesh. It was easy to fall back into the mindset of a rogue. On some mental level I knew just because I was being surrounded by a pack didn't make me apart of one. I was still a rogue in my heart.

I felt riled and conceived in my anger. Tears burned at the flesh of my face and I snarled hating this feeling. It was like a death grip at my throat. I shuddered multiple breaths trying not to work myself into an aggressive shift. That would be painful but it was a feeling I knew all too well.

If I could let my wolf consume me for just a minute I would be alright. I sounded naive like an addict ready to slip after fighting to stay in control.

"You don't look to good."

Her voice made my eyes instantaneously gold. "Rogue..." I snarled breathless. I wasn't trying to reflect my anger onto her.

"Look at you...Kayla. How are you letting them affect you like this? Why did you come back to them?"

She was not hiding her anger towards me. "I have...a daughter."

"I gathered that...the last time I saw you." She shifted her body to a straighter stance, taking me in. "You're not happy with them."

"I am..." I think I was. It was my wolf that hadn't accepted them.

Rogue laughed at my unsure response. "They," she let the mention of them hang in the air as if talking about my pack; or the pack I was with were disdainful beings. "They...kicked you out of their pack. Your father spat on your existence and you fucking go back to them. How? But then again...maybe you can relate to them."

I knew what she was saying. "Rogue...it was never--"

"Never." Rogue laughed hysterical with no humor in her eyes. It was a bit sadistic. "Never say never. You are just as bad as them."

"Rogue..." I needed to explain. "I should have explain--"

"Explain what? Why you wanted to kill my fucking father. You thought I would give you the okay...make an open door for you to do so."

"No...of course not."

"You betrayed me."

I rushed up to Rogue feeling consumed with guilt. Rogue didn't allow me the chance to touch her as she raked her claws across my face.

Deep lacerations split open as blood pooled out. I closed my eyes forcing my wolf down. I wouldn't fight her. "I'm sorry." Tears swelled my eyes but never spilled. "I never wanted to hurt you."

"Did you even love me?" Rogue asked as if scared of my answer. Deep down I knew she cared to know.

"Of course...I loved you with every being of me." I said honestly. My heart hadn't fully grown cold and empty until after Rogue. "All I wanted was you. And I ruined those chances."

"How could you be with someone else?" Tears fell from her eyes, heartbroken because of me. "After you left...I waited for you, hoping you would come back and explain why..."

I swallowed. "I wanted to...but I thought you were done with me and I knew how I...handle things...keeping secrets from you. I hated myself." I looked her in the eyes. "But...my reasons were right. Your father was and still is harming humans and our own kind."

"My father is not harming anyone. He's a brilliant man," Rogue said, defending her fathers honor. "You use to believe that."

"Until I saw first hand what he was capable of."