The Interview

Happy Birthday

Ellen's POV

I was sitting in my trailer, not knowing what to do. I got so many flowers and presents, not only from my colleagues but also from my fans. They also made a lot of videos with their stories and stories about me as an actress and also as Meredith Grey. 

But I was sitting there, all alone because I've also seen one printscreen with the conversation between me and Patrick which I wanted to forget forever. It hurt. The fans wanted to see this conversation again but this time Patrick wishing me happy birthday for my 50th. And I couldn't do anything else than to agree with them.

I took a glass of water from the counter and took a sip. I felt so exhausted. I wanted to enjoy my day with my friends, my family, but somehow I just couldn't... I couldn't because of him. Deep inside, I was hoping he would come here and congratulate me, but I also knew that this is very impossible.

I was sitting on the chair, looking at all those flowers I got when suddenly someone knocked on the door. I didn't feel like accepting any other congratulations and flowers and chocolates. I stood up and opened the door. I wasn't surprised to see a mail guy with a huge bouquet of white tulips. Wait... white tulips? 

"Hello," he said, "I have a special delivery for the most beautiful lady on this planet." He smiled at me and handed me the flowers.

"Ouch... thank you. Who are they from?" I asked but the delivery man just smiled.

"Well, the person said that you would know. It was pleasure to meet you. I hope you enjoy the flowers." And with that, he closed the door and I was standing there with the beautiful flowers and a note left in it. I had to sit down. I carefully put down the flowers on the table and took the note. My heart was beating fast because I wanted to open the note but on the other hand, I didn't want to in case it wasn't from him. How can you be so stupid? Why on earth would he send you flowers? 

I was playing with the note with my fingers and finally, I decided to open it. I felt really strange, full of emotions. The note wasn't long.

I hope your day is filled with love as all the b-days before we spent together.

Also, I hope you still like this kind of flowers. :-)

Happy Birthday!

Love you,

P.

My hands were shaking and first tears were forming in my eyes. I wanted to cry... from happiness, from saddness, from the feeling of loneliness. And all of a sudden, I was really crying. Desperatedly, deeply, crying. It hurt. All the years of separation, all the months of ignoring, all the weeks of loss, all the days of pain. I wanted to lay down on the floor and cry everything out of me, to get rid of it, of the feeling that he's not here with me. 

After what seems like hours, I was finally able to function, let's say, normally. I read the note once again. He sent me flowers for my birthday. He didn't forget. He didn't forget the colour and the kind of flowers. He didn't forget at all. I felt like nothing else is important. I wanted to throw everything away, all my responsabilities, habits, everything. I felt like I am only here to be with him, to forget everything we've done to each other and just go back to what we had.

I got my mobile and dialed Sam. 

"Hey, I wanted to ask... well... is it possible... could you... fuck. Do you think you could find Patrick's mobile number?" Fuck. I screwed, I souded like a total idiot. But at the same time, I was surprised by her short answer. No questions.

"Sure." Was all she said. I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. Sam hung up few moments before but I was still holding my mobile next to my ear till the moment I got a message. It was from Sam with Patrick's new phone number. I was scared to open it because in that case, it would mean I would have to process the fact that I want to write him. But I don't want to. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what I wanted to do. So without any further thinking, I opened the message and clicked on the number and started to write a new message...