The Interview

Have you ever...?

Ellen's POV

I was preparing dinner for my family. Finally I had a free afternoon so I had time to have a normal dinner and then watch some movie with my children. Chris was... somewhere. I don't even care where the hell he is. Since we've agreed on showing up in public from time to time and then live our separate lives, I didn't give a damn. And I realised that I don't miss him at all. I don't need him in my life, I can handle everything on my own.

At around 8 pm I was setting the table and called for my children to come to the table.

"So... my darlings, I made pasta for you with your favourite sauce and cheese on top!" I said proudly and looked at their excited faces.

"Mommy, you're the best!" they said almost in unison.

During the dinner, I heard my phone beeping all the time but I didn't want to disturb our dinner so I ignored it. According to the beeping, it was definitely twitter. My brain started to function rapidly as I was thinking what's happened that my fans were tweeting so much. Have I missed any anniversary? Has something happened with Chris? I couldn't focus on the dinner so I didn't even notice that my children have already finished their meal and sat in front of the TV watching some cartoon. My phone began to ring.

I got up and reached for my phone. It was Lauren.

"Hey girl," I said and smiled. There was a silent for a while so I got worried even more.

"Hi Ellen... have you... have you checked the internet?" Lauren asked. I frowned a little.

"No, I haven't. Why? What happened?" I asked her with my heart beating so fast I couldn't breathe properly. I got pretty nervous.

"Ah... okay... you better watch before I tell you. Call me when you're ready." And with that, she hung up. My hands started to shake as I opened the twitter.

Patrick Dempsey still in love with his ex co-star

Patrick Dempsey admitted he still loves Ellen Pompeo

Patrick Dempsey on getting divorce

Ellen Pompeo and Patrick Dempsey's secret love

I scrolled down the articles till I found the interview with Patrick. I couldn't breathe. I sat down on a bar stool and put my mobile on the counter. 

I got new message. I was frightened to open it. I saw it was from Chris. I tapped on the icon.

Chris: I think we can separate now in public, too

I fell the first tear falling down my cheek. What the hell is happening? I decided to open the link with the interview. Fuck. No way he said that. I replayed the part with the last question from the public.

Do you still love her?

Well that's not approp...

Yes... Yes, I do.

I stopped the video right the moment with his face saying those words. It's been four years. Four fucking years pretending happy life and now this. It hurt. What should I do? What the fuck. I felt little dizzy. I don't even have his phone number. Why should I need his phone number? This is nothing.

I called Lauren. She picked up the phone immediately.

"So... Ellen... you're fucked up." I chuckled. Fuck.

"What? It's just an interview, he's said it before so many times..."
"No, he only said that he immediately fell in love with your Boston accent." she argued with me.

"No... with me. Whatever... It's just a stupid interview and that's it." I stated and I calmed down myself a little, my overreaction faded away.

"Ellen... listen... Have you ever thought that he might still love you? Have you ever considered the option to talk to him again? Have you ever felt the need to call him or chat with him, go out for a dinner like you used to?" Lauren hurled everything on me what I didn't want to hear. What I've been hiding from for four years.

I took a deep breath. After a long pause I responded.

"Every single day." Simple as that. I confessed to Lauren and also to myself what's been going on last four years. I felt like an emotional wreck. I wanted to talk to him so bad but I was scared. I felt that he doesn't want to talk to me again. Why would he?

"Look, is my 50th birthday next week and I need to settle everything so I don't really have time for this." I said as I wanted to end this conversation. Because deep down I wanted to listen to his voice again, to hear him saying he still loves me.

"Ellen, you should talk to him. That's it." She hung up. I still kept my phone on my ear as I was expecting something. I put down my phone and played the interview once again. I paused again the video with his face shown in the interview. I saw his perfect hair, his ocean blue eyes that sparkled when he said yes. I touched the screen of my mobile as to caress him.

"I love you, too, Patrick."