3 - Dealing With It

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***Valentine***

I was a statue sitting on the sofa. After all I'd been through... you'd think I deserved a Mate who actually wanted me. But I guess we don't always get what we want.

Hurt. Hurt and pain were my new best friends right about now. Ever since he walked out that door they had taken up residence in my heart. Not only did the rejection hurt, but... the things he accused me of, especially coming from the person who was meant to love and cherish you, I think possibly that hurt the worst. The thing was, I wasn't like that anymore. Sure, I had been bad before, and I'll admit to that, but I wasn't like that anymore, since... I just wasn't like that anymore. I had changed from the girl I used to be. In fact, now that girl disgusted me. She had had no self respect, had been a tease to any guy and threw them away after, never even looking at them again. But she was gone now. I'm no longer like that!

I had changed and that he would base his judgement on me on my past self and from nothing more than stories from others? That hurt. Bad.

"Val, I just saw Zed leaving the garden, what happened....?" Zandra rounded the corner of the door and saw me sitting there on the sofa, looking at the floor. "Valentine? What happened?"

I looked sadly up at her. "He rejected me, straight out," I admitted, ashamed that even my Mate could not deal with what I had been like.

Zandra's mouth dropped open. And then she got angry. "OH THAT BLOODY BASTARD! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON THAT COWARD, HE'S GOING TO HAVE TO SAY HIS LAST FAREWELLS TO HIS BOLLOCKS BEFORE I CUT THEM RIGHT OF AND FEED THEM TO THE DOGS! I'M GUNNA-" She started marching towards the door, fists clenched and cheeks flushed from anger.

"NO! No, don't you dare, Zandra!" I clamped my hand on her shoulder and pulled her back to face me. "I don't want him to come for me just because our Alpha ordered him to! Za, please, don't let anyone know."

She looked at me and pursed her lips. "Fine," she grumbled. "Tell me what happened, and don't leave anything out." I did as she asked. By the end of it I'm sure that she was thinking of more sinister things to do to Zed than cutting off his balls and feeding them to the dogs, but I knew she would respect my wished and not try to kill him. "I'm going to kill him," she hissed. Okay, maybe not then.

"Zandra, NO. You cannot do anything, do you understand me? You will not threaten him, you will not stifle him in the pack, you will not give him any idea that you know anything about what happened here, okay?" I pleaded.

She puffed out a breath. "Yes, okay, I understand."

"Not even Flynn!"

"Yeah, okay, fine, I promise!" We sat in silence for a while. "What are you going to do now?" she asked me quietly.

"Honestly? I don't know, but... I might have to leave- No, Zandra let me finish!" I told her as she opened her mouth. "I might have to go because I'm not sure if I can deal with seeing him day to day."

"Where do you plan to go, then? Another Pack?" she asked bitterly.

"No of course not to another Pack, this is my home! You know that. What I meant is, I might train to be in the RAF, you know, follow in Dad's footsteps." I fiddled with the edge of my top. "I was thinking about doing that anyway. You know that university and academics weren't ever really my thing."

"But, Val, thats where your Dad died..." Zandra started.

"I know. Trust me I know. But I also know that he would have been proud of me if I did it." Ever since my Father had died in a crash whilst on duty with the Royal Air Force, and Mum following not far behind him not able to deal with the loss of her Mate, their views were all that mattered to me. They were the reason I had changed. They weren't happy about how I was acting, but they loved me anyway. Then they were gone, taken from me.

"Okay, Val, if that's what you want." She pulled me to her and I finally let the tears slip past my eyelids. My Mate had rejected me, true, but I would move past it and be stronger, just like I did with my parent's death. I didn't let it pull me down but instead lived in their name, and I would do the same with this.

"I, Valentine Phoenix Orson, accept the rejection of Zed Griffin, in the eyes of my Alpha and my Pack."

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