BTS Oneshots & Drabbles

The Way Things Are//Hoseok

In the winter, everything is bare. The trees lose their color and they no longer give shade. The rivers grow muddy or freeze over. The temperatures drop and force the people to bundle in layer after layer. Streets are filled with people trying to rush into buildings and out of the cold. The once blue sky is covered in expansive gray clouds that block out the sun.

And for her, winter also means he is gone.

Or at least that last stretch of winter, the long stretch, after the early winter holidays when he comes home for a few weeks and fills up her days with his silly humor and bright laughter.

Those days are like early springtime for her.

But that is the short part of winter. The long part comes when he returns to school and she returns to her studies. The decorations from the holidays are put away and the colors turn drab and the streets go bare. Essays, research, and exams begin to pile up in school planners. Instead of nights of being well-rested, the days are filled with too many cups of coffee and the jittery anxiety that accompanies too much caffeine.

Overall, the time is cold and dark and lonely.

Hoseok was studying dance at a school in Busan.

She was studying to be a lawyer at the prestigious Ajou University, finishing up her undergraduate degree.

They were almost 300 km apart, too far to just travel casually. Besides, they'd both decided that the main priority both of them had was their education.

They both had accepted that for themselves and one another. They'd spent long hours on the park benches watching the sunset talking it over. They had paragraphs of texts establishing what they both wanted and needed from the other. Understanding. Patience. Honesty. And a promise to always be friends.

She had accepted that this was the best thing for both of them at the moment.

Hoseok needed to focus on dance, and for herself, well, becoming a lawyer was no easy thing.

It had been Hoseok who had decided that during their time at university, they should remain just friends. He had said he couldn't balance a relationship between his college courses, and he didn't want to make things harder for her. He'd told her that he'd want to be able to see his girlfriend whenever he liked, and he just couldn't do that while he was in Busan and she was in Seoul.

"We don't know what will be, but for now, this is how things have to stay."

Sometimes, she would replay those words in her head. That had been what they'd ended their last conversation about their relationship status on.

Sometimes, she would reread through some of the messages they'd sent back and forth that first time they'd talked about their feelings.

It was hard to have feelings for him, and he saying "just friends". She had to remind herself sometimes that he too, liked her in another way.

It was silly she knew, but for her the feelings were real.

It was hard to see her friends going out on dates, getting boyfriends, and falling in love.

Usually, her weekends were spent helping her friends get ready for dates, and then returning to her own apartment to do homework or to watch her favorite sitcom while eating a pint of ice cream.

It wasn't that she thought this was bad or pathetic, but she just missed Hoseok.

It was hard to just have a cell phone connecting them.

But the hardest thing was that she knew things didn't need to be this way.

They could be together. They could drive to spend time together more often. They could put a serious tone on their relationship. They just weren't

It wasn't that they couldn't, they just weren't. It wasn't that he couldn't be with her, he just wouldn't .

A/N:

hahahaha, i'm back, kinda.

this is very therapeutic for me and i've missed it a lot. this is only part one, so you can look forward to more :)

please eat well and take care of yourselves!

~Novi