Never forgotten ~ Bucky Barnes

THIRTY

You hate who you've become, but there's nothing you can do about it. All you can do is wallow in self hatred and loathe at the creature you've become.

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Feeling the wind attack my exposed body made it feel as if someone was constantly whipping me. My cheeks became icy and cold quickly. My body felt light as a feather, yet I knew it wasn't. I let my body absorb the feeling of freedom it gave me and closed my eyes, my brain finally starting to process the fact we can't go back.

I open my eyes to see Winter falling as well. He was close to my body and I reached my right hand out, clasping it around his left one. We hold tightly, not daring to let the other go. Though it felt as if time had stopped momentarily, I couldn't quite understand why it did. To get rid of the foreign emotion, I looked past Winter to the destroyed helicarriers. They were in shambles and falling, everything was shattered beyond repair. By the time they stopped firing, the skeletons of the air crafts was gone. Nothing was up in the air anymore, the people who we were against did what they intended to do. Destroy Hydra.

I refocused my exhausted and heavy eyes on Winter who was looking past me, I followed his eye sight as much as possible, but when I heard the splash of water I knew what he was looking at. Steve had reached the water, no doubt unconscious from the attack I inflicted on him as well as Winter's. My body flinched slightly at the thought but tried to push the said thought away. I looked back up to see Winters steel blue, dull, eyes on me. His face had creases where he frowned often to look intimidating yet to me he could never. No emotion was displayed on his enervated face.

Winters eyes were on my face but weren't with the present, they were distant. He was caught up in some sort of crisis in his head.

It felt like time had gone back to normal when I realised the wind around my body picked up. It was getting harder to hold onto Winter, the wind was pushing him up and out my grasp. My arm stretching to keep in distance of Winters. Though it wasn't good enough, Winter wasn't focusing and the wind was against us. I was alone trying to stick to the one person I trusted.

Yet, it was like the world was against me. By the time Winter came back to his senses, the wind had practically forced itself between our hands and had pulled me away. Winter's eyes had widened and the look of consternation etched on his face. Slightly unkept eyebrows rose in sheer shock at what happened. Winter started to try and swim to me but the wind pushed him up in the air, all the while I was gaining speed downwards to the water below.

I didn't know how much longer I had till the bottom but I knew it wasn't far, a flash of pain emerged in my head. The familiar feeling moving around my body. I couldn't decipher why it happened and how it happened. The look on Winters face told me I really didn't have long left. My ears started to ring and I couldn't hear what was going on. My eyes felt heavier than before and I knew what was happening. I was trying to fight it before it took over.

The hazel eyes of mine fought one last time and glanced at Winter before I struck the freezing cold water. My body went into shock but it didn't last long the serums in my body worked against it. However, the bones and muscles in my body were tired and sore but I had endured worse. The frigid water seeped through my tactical gear.

The water around me vibrated as another body hit the water and it seemed like they were heading my way. My eyes were open but the shadows from above water level blocked my vision to see who it was. My legs and arms got back into action, adrenaline kicking in. I kicked my way away from the person, distancing myself from them. A hand reached out and latched onto my arm. My own arm sprung out and tried to push them off but as soon as I saw a glint of silver from the sun light I relaxed knowing it was Winter.

I allowed him to pull me up so I was floating on the water but diving down again soon after. It had been a matter of a few minutes when he resurfaced with Steve in-tow. Steve was still unconscious and his cheek was swollen. A cut lined his face on his cheekbone and blood was trickling down the open wound. Dark patches circled where I had shot him and his suit was drenched all the way through.

Winter avoided my eyes and started to swim and drag Steve along with him to the shore. Legs sore and weak but my heart was strong as I swam after them. My head was muddled with what to do. I didn't know what was right and what was wrong. Or who were the good people. I knew I could trust Winter without a doubt but could I trust myself?

The thought floated around my mind. I couldn't trust myself at all. How could I if I didn't even know who I was?

Fingers snapped in front of my face and I realised I was at the edge of the bank where it met with grass. I mentally shook my head but I blinked my eyes. I pushed myself up and out the water into a standing position while taking deep needed breaths.

My gaze wondered to the blonde haired man laying on the ground unmoving. Guilt ripped my insides up, the same feeling I would get when...When I would see Winter in the chair. I shuddered.

I felt lost and, if I wanted to admit it or not, I was scared. It all felt to real and foreign, like a nightmare of sorts but it wasn't and I knew that.

"What...what do we do now Winter?", voice shaky as I asked.

"We run, we can't let Hydra get us. Not now." Voice glum and writhing in anxiousness. I bob my head up and down while taking one last long gaze on the Captain before I raise my eyes.

"Where will we go? Or who do we trust now?"

"I don't know. But we can't stay here.", he turns his slowly head before continuing. "We don't trust anyone but ourselves. It's too dangerous. If we start now we can get a good distance away from here." , I don't falter or skip a beat in answering back, putting my full trust in him.

"Okay. Where to then?", I say as we start walking, our clothes dripping and hair stuck to our necks.

The world we knew was against us and we had to figure out who we were. We didn't know how to but we were about to try as we go.

We had each other and at this point of time, that's all we needed.