It was warm down there, really warm, as it had always been. Ash fell upon his shoulders, the sounds of chains and screaming filled the place, the doors looked all the same. Nothing had changed, nothing could ever change. It was so dark that he thought he would never see light ever again, so loud that he thought he would never hear a whisper again, so horrible that he thought he would never be able to smile again.
He had lost touch with himself, with the man he had become. He felt as if his seven years on earth had never happened, like all that he was now was all that he had always been in the past. He struggled with the image of himself every single time he saw his reflection on the mirror, unable to put into words how he felt, what being back in hell made him feel.
Those had been the longest eighty years of his life.
They had been the longest because he knew he wasn't whole, he knew there was a part of himself that had remained on earth, that kept on living without him. He felt selfish every single time the thought did as much as cross his head, but he hoped that she had been suffering and aching just as much as he had. He wanted to know if she had been as miserable as he had because if she had, then it would mean that their last night together wasn't a lie. He needed reassurance somehow because how could someone just love the devil? A human that a couple of months ago thought he was crazy, that thought it was all a metaphor, how could she, out of all humans, love him? She chose to love him.
Five hundred and twenty-two days had to go by. Five hundred and twenty-two days of suffering, of loneliness, of pure and sick torture, had to go by before he could hear from her. And when he did, he didn't know what to do. He thought that maybe Amenadiel would pop down to Hell once or twice a year to update him on what he left behind, on the people he loved so much. However, when he hears her voice instead of that of his brother's... needless to say, a shiver runs down his spine. Her voice had been like a glass of cold, fresh water in the middle of the desert, allowing him to feel again, to escape the dullness and sick torture of Hell.
He never imagined that she would pray to him, that she would voice her feelings towards him, that he would hear her cry inside his mind. That had been one of the most painful yet beautiful things he ever had to endure, feeling her pain as if it were his own. She sounded so broken, so desperate, she missed him so much, but moreover, she still loved him as much as the day he left.
He allowed himself to cry when Chloe's sweet and broken voice could no longer be heard inside his head. He had finally gotten that confirmation, the certainty that, indeed, Chloe missed him just as much, and that her life on Earth was just as hard without him as his life was in Hell without her. He just cried, scared that his memories with her would just start to fade away, that he would no longer remember their special moments, their 'greatest hits' as he had once named them. He was scared that everything that had made them 'Lucifer & Chloe' would someday just disappear.
He patiently waited for another prayer, waited for her to talk to him again, to voice her emotions. How disappointed he was when days, then weeks, and ultimately more than a year went by before he heard of her again. It had been roughly about the same time, five hundred and something days. It had to happen again for him to realize that it was a pattern and after he understood that, he made it the norm that no one could bother him during those days where he was expecting her prayer. It was something too precious and beautiful for him to miss, much less for him not to pay enough attention to.
During those eighty years that went by, all the devil had to look forward to was hearing the voice of his lover once every year and a half. He had no other purpose than that, no other motivation that would keep him going. Just the mere image of his detective was enough for him to try and be strong when in reality, he could feel himself falling apart. He couldn't help it but miss her deeply.
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She's Got The Devil's Eyes - Deckerstar (Completed)
FanfictionSet after 4x10 with a little, tiny, itty bitty change to the end scene. "What meaning would life have if one's world was destroyed? Well, Lucifer's world was no longer Earth, it was no longer the free will, the chicks and the booze it offered, no. H...