My Villain

Rose dagger

Warnings: foul language,Trigger Warring, gore, cutting, suicide
If you are uncomfortable with this topic then please don't force yourself to read. Help is available if you feel like leave this world. It well get better.
Words:920
Recap-
Useless
I know but at least I tried
Dumb
I know, I promise all be smarter
Murder
It's my fault
Slut
No one loves you
But... never mind
You deserve no happiness
Your right,
You killed him
I wasn't enough to save him
I see why people call you ugly
It's because I am
You should die
Please stop
Cunt
I need to think
Bastard
Shut up
Murder
I said ShUT UP
Your bad luck
BE Quite!!
You should die already
ShUT Up
ShUT Up
ShUT Up
I see why he hits you
You deserve nothing
Stop
Please just stop
Good for nothing
Weak
I can't take this
Bitch
Die
Whore
It's your fault
I-I'm sorry
It should've been you
Your right
Kill yourself
....ok
🖤

I snap awake in a cold sweat. It's my fault. Everything's my fault he wouldn't have died if I was stronger, mom wouldn't be gone, dad would be happy, Kacchan wouldn't have to put up with me and my dumbass. Toga wouldn't have to baby sit me. I-I should die.

I slip out of bed careful not to wake up Kacchan. I walk over to his side, I'll miss him. I kiss his lips softly, "bye Kacchan.... I'm sorry, I love you". I open the dresser near his side of the bed. Kacchan kept it in here I wonder does he still have it. I rummage the drawers until "I found it".

It's a knife but it's longer so maybe it's a dagger. What ever it is it's sharp and beautiful. It has dark emerald vines and litter green leafs on the handle. Along with a red rose in the center. Then there's the blade it looks brand new, it's a nice silver color. It has a clear casing so I can almost see it perfectly.

I lift it up it's not to heave but since I'm weak I can feel the weight of it. It shines brightly in the moon light, the moon it's almost full. But it's big and bright, the stars even look brighter. I wonder well I become a star. I slowly tread to the bathroom, "sorry Kacchan this is gonna be hard to clean up I promise all try and end it quickly. And all try and be clean about it".

Opening the door I'm met with the mirror in the I can't see myself it's just a lifeless body there. But If that's what I look like I'm ugly. I'm really thin but not thin enough. My hair is clean and shiny but it's a mess. My skin is pale, but covered in scars and it looks sickly. Oh heavens my eyes, they big and round, but now there dull and have a grayish tiny to them. Ugh I've always hated my freckles. The kids would always say 'whys that dirty on your face' and call me other names as well.

The sound of Kacchan turning in the bed snaps me out of it. It's time I'm selfish for dragging it on this long. I close the door so that if I do make a noise Kacchan won't wake up. I lock the door, if I do this in the bath tub then Kacchan we'll have less mess to clean. I step into the bathtub, it's cold on my bare I'm feet. I sit down slowly so I don't make a noise.

Open the knife case was harder then expected. When it opened it made a very loud 'pop' it scared me and almost dropped it. The knife fits perfectly in my hand, I put the case of it on the floor outside the bath. I play with the knife a little it hurts the a bit the first time. I watch as my blood flows from the multiple cuts. I guess I just feel so numb that I can't feel it, I can't even cry any more. Sorry Kacchan I guess I can't make it clean... or fast. It's definitely a good thing I'm in the bathtub.

I'm starting to get light headed, but I'm still stable. I'm to weak I couldn't last in this life. I'm ending it right now, the blade runs in my skin a trail of blood fallows. It stings a little when the air touches it. More this won't do it, I slice several over my arms. There deep but it's not good enough more. I slice my arms up more and thighs to, the bath is painted in a thick red substance. Most of my skin can't be seen from all the blood.

My head feels like its gonna explode. The stench of blood is almost to much for me. You know dad was right I'm going to die alone. But that's okay, I deserves it. I'm just selfish for wishing someone was with me. Besides no one would want to be with me. It's funny throughout my life I wanted to be happy but I don't deserve it. I can't hold the knife any more it slips out of my hand.

"I'm tired"

....

It's finally time to sleep

....

The pain is fading away

My eye lids feel heavy

...

Everything's getting dark now

...

I feel like I'm floating in water

"It's cold"

...

pure black has taken over my vision