Camp Camp Oneshots - AKA Me trying to hold back from only doing Daniel stuff

My Dumbassery that Deserves to be Immortalized in Fanfiction (Part 1)

(But then it actually became a semi-serious fic)

I honestly don't really like the intro to this but whatever, it's been a while. Like, months. I'll add an A/N at the end explaining why I disappeared.

Max yawned and adjusted his over-sized sunglasses, tired from all of the trouble he had caused that day. David was too busy shooing thousands of fireflies out of the Mess Hall to notice that the trio had gone to the lake shore and picked a random tree to lounge around.

David shouldn't have asked the campers if anyone had a light when the overhead light's bulb burnt out in the middle of dinner, and he certainly shouldn't have accepted Nikki's offer to bring some.

Nikki sat on the highest branch that could support her weight, antagonizing any unlucky fools who passed under the tree on the search for the trio by throwing sticks and acorns at their heads. Max sat halfway up the tree, trying to take a nap, with no success. Every time Nikki moved, a few leaves fell onto him, keeping him wide awake the whole time. Finally, Neil sat on one of the lowest branches, able to jump down at a moment's notice. The other two called him a coward, but he felt better knowing that he wouldn't sprain his ankle too badly falling from that height.

The sun finally disappeared below the horizon, and the kids were getting tired. Neil was the first to get down, with a calculated jump that ended almost gracefully, if it wasn't for him losing his footing as he met with the ground and tumbling right into the sand. Nikki went next, yelling "CANNONBALL!" and crashing into Neil in ball formation. 

Now it was Max's turn. The tree seemed taller than it was when Nikki helped him and Neil get up it. He just stared down at the ground for a minute.

"...Max, aren't you coming down?" Nikki asked. 

"I've decided not to! I'm staying up here! Go away!" Max yelled back. 

"You aren't afraid, are you?" Nikki teased. Max took the sunglasses off of his head and threw them in her direction.

"I'm not afraid! I just don't want to get down!" 

"I think we should get David, maybe he can get a ladder...." Neil suggested. Max dropped one of his shoes on his head. "Alright, fine, we're leaving!"

"So we're getting David, right?" Nikki asked in a whisper.

"Oh no, definitely." Neil replied.

-

"MAX! DON'T WORRY!" David screamed, running at the tree while holding a ladder over his head.

"Jesus fuck- GO AWAY, DAVID!" Max yelled. "I'm staying up here!" David set the ladder against the tree and extended it anyways. He scaled it up to where Max was and reached out with both arms.

"Come on, buddy!" David said, wrapping Max in a hug. The whole camp giggled while Max kicked and squirmed. The camp stopped laughing when the movement caused the ladder to started to fall backwards. The camp screamed when Max and David came crashing hard into the ground under the weight of the ladder.

-

Max woke up in a white room with lots of medical equipment and a TV playing an old, muted episode of Spongebob with French subtitles. His right arm was in a sling, but that seemed to be the extent of his injuries except for maybe a concussion. There was a "Get well soon!" card on the bedside table, and a balloon tied to it that said "Happy fucking whatever", crossed out with "It was the only kind they had left! Get well soon! :)" scribbled under it.

There was also a big window in his room, so he climbed out of the hospital bed to look out of it. The parking lot was fairly empty, the hospital probably didn't get many visits, seeing how few people lived in the area. It wasn't hard to find the Camp Mobile, parked as close as it legally could be to the hospital's entrance.

"Max, there's someone here to see you." A voice said from behind him. Max jumped, he hadn't heard the nurse enter the room. Gwen walked into the room and sighed.

"Thank god, just a broken arm. That was a nasty fall you two took." Gwen sat in a chair near the window. "The nurse said you might have a concussion, so you might have to get checked for that."

As if on cue, the nurse brought out a flashlight and shined it in Max's eyes.

"It seems to be just a minor concussion, we should be able to release him tonight." The nurse said. "If he starts throwing up at night, bring him back." 

"Alright kid, I'm going to see David next, then I'm running to the store to pick up eggs for camp, and I'll be back to pick you up tonight." With that, Gwen left the room and Max was alone with the nurse, who didn't talk much. The room was quiet again.

"Hey, where's David's room?" He asked, putting on his best innocent kids eyes.

"You mean the man you came in with? He's in 114." Max waited for the nurse to leave. Once he was alone, he poked his head through the door to make sure the hallway was empty. When he was sure the coast was clear, he crept out of his room and looked at the room numbers. He made his way down the hall to 114. When he got there, he saw Gwen step out of the room. He quickly hid behind a vending machine.

When the sound of her footsteps got far enough, he stepped out from behind the machine and entered David's room. The man was very focused on the French subbed Spongebob and didn't notice Max come in. Max surveyed his injuries while he was distracted.

David's left arm was in a sling and he had an ankle cast on his right foot. His injuries didn't seem too much worse than Max's. Finally, Max spoke up.

"David." He said. David looked over to Max immediately.

"Max? What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Gwen left to buy eggs, and I don't speak French. Or really care about Spongebob." Max answered. David scooted to the side and patted the spot next to him. Max glared at him, but pulled himself onto the bed anyways.

-

Gwen walked into David's room first, to wake him up so they could go get Max and check out of the hospital. She hadn't expected to find them both asleep, with the Spongebob movie paused halfway in on the TV, but those two were full of surprises.

When the three were finally back at camp, the campers asked thousands of questions, none of which Max felt like answering, but he also wanted everyone off his back, so he half assed all of the answers.

"Are you guys okay?" "No, we're dead."

"Is your arm broken?" "No, I'm wearing this for fun."

"Do you have amnesia?" "I can't remember."

"What was the hospital like?" "Space kid, you've been to that hospital before you fucking idiot!"

As for David, he slept happily that night, knowing Max was safe, barely hurt, and that he'd warmed up to him.

---

Don't you love when you're planning on writing a little shitpost but you accidentally write a thousand word Dadvid whump?

Before you ask, I did NOT fall off a ladder and get hospitalized. I got stuck in a tree once and all of my classmates saw. I honestly don't know how all of this ^ happened.

Ok now for the elephant in the room: Why I disappeared for 5 months.
I've been struggling a lot with mental health. I like writing, but I can barely ever get motivation and usually end up hating what I write (I have 11 drafts in this book-) 
I still haven't gotten therapy but I'm close, I think. In other news, I am a boy now.
*confetti*
You might not have even known I was a girl, but I thought I'd mention it anyways.
So yeah, I've just kind of been living on auto-pilot for like nearly half a year (jesus, when I say it like that it sounds so weird. almost half a year??)

In conclusion,
stan SIX.

(please help my friend made me watch it and now all of the songs are playing at once in my head constantly)