It was crystal clear - crystal clear to everyone and anyone but them. Each glance told the story of the longing and the love that was mistaken to be unrequited.
If only.
If only one of them had the courage, if only one had lowered his or her pride, if only one had let his or her guard down and let the heart do the talking, then maybe, just maybe, they would've ended up together.
He wasn't the type who'd fall for a girl at one glance. But something about her was so magnetic, that he felt his heart, his whole being even, gravitate towards her that instant. He wasn't the type who'd trip and stutter in front of girls. But something about her made him forget all the words in his vocabulary, and embarrass himself in front of his and her teammates. He wasn't the type who'd chase after someone who seemed uninterested in him. He thought too highly of himself to do something like that. But she made him run under the pouring rain just so he can ask her for her number.
She unintentionally made him step out of his comfort zone. She made him a person he never thought he'd be. But the feelings were all too foreign for him. He didn't know how to handle the feelings that were causing him to stay awake at night, thinking about that one girl's infectious smile.
He wasn't confused. He knew what he felt.
Every single time she said hello, his heart felt as if it's going to beat out of his chest. He could even pick her out from a huge crowd, as if his eyes had a focus that was made for her. He treasured all the moments he made her laugh, etching in his mind the creases on her forehead and cheeks, remembering the sound of laughter that resonated throughout his being.
He wasn't confused, but he was afraid.
He was afraid that once he admitted how he felt, she'd start avoiding him like the plague. That's why he stayed her friend as long as his heart allowed him. Despite what his friends told him, amidst the assurance given by her friends, he never gave in. He never told her how he felt. Because he felt that she'd be uninterested in him, because in the back of his mind, there was a voice telling him that she wouldn't like him.
He thought that whatever action she did that made his heart flutter was unintentional. None of them never meant anything to her, even if they meant the world to him. He thought that they were all platonic and that he'd be stupid if he hold on to those moments.
But the more he tried to tame his feelings, the more they grew. From a little seed at the core of his heart, it grew and grew. It grew to the point where it consumed his heart. And he knew that he loved her more than anything.
But he was a coward. He gave her mixed signals. Letting himself induldge in moments with her one moment, then suddenly retracting and leaving her hanging. He was a douche, and he knew it. He never thought that fear would overcome love so much. He knew that his fear of loss was taking its toll on whatever they had. His fear let the love in his heart die. Overpowering it to a point where he was able to stop thinking of her smile, instead reminding him of what could happen she found out and rejects him. The fear made him settle for friendship, instead of pursuing and succumbing to the feelings.
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She was the type of girl who preferred oversized shirts over cropped tops, sneakers over doll shoes. She was one of the boys, and she didn't really mind any of it all. She was a volleyball player, but never backed down when challenged for a round of one-on-one on the basketball court. She was the kind of girl that didn't mind eating like a construction worker, and she was proud of it even. She hated make-up almost as much as she hated mayonnaise. She wasn't ordinary, but she was sure of who she was. But he came rushing into her life like a freight train, and put everything out of their place.
BINABASA MO ANG
The Story of Us
Fiksi PenggemarUnexpected meetings, sweet nothings and bitter endings; a compilation of one-shots about UAAP and PBA players.