Short Story Collections

Science is weird

New story! A bit different from others but still good! (I hope🙄)
Contains: •cussing •gay •death
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Science is weird, I think that goes without saying though. I mean, Wind, where the hell does it come from? The turning of the planet? It's crazy, now scientists are starting to drive people insane! And I'm not talking about giving shock therapy or drilling any holes in heads. No. I'm talking about reincarnation and how you've died before. Those nerds in lab coats have really outdone themselves this time! They've discovered that whatever you are currently afraid of, is what killed you in your past life. If you're afraid of nothing, this is probably your first life. A lot of people are afraid of old age, or disease. I've even met someone afraid of clowns. My best friend is terrified of spiders.

But me?

What am I afraid of? Well, I guess my biggest fear would just confuse others. I can't believe I'm actually talking about it...

My biggest fear, is the Great Tit. Yes, it's an actual thing, it's a type of bird. Looks like this:

And for some reason it scares the shit out of me. The way it walks, it basically bounces like a slime or something. Which is kinda ironic still though, because I'm gay. It weirds me out just thinking about it.

But anyway, as previously stated, it was discovered that whatever you're afraid of is what killed you in your past life...
so how the fuck this happened, I've got no damn clue. How this bird killed me, well, beats me! How this is scientific, no clue there either! But now, thanks to those nerds in lab coats, you can take a test that tells you how you were killed. And you best bet your ass I'm going to take it! I'm honestly more curious than scared at this point. Or at least, that's what I tell myself.
I scroll through my Pinterest feed, seeing the newest memes on our country's newest discovery. Plus all the ads for new cars and the test I previously mentioned. I give up and open a new tab on my computer. The sun shining through my window makes the dust on my screen more clear than the actual display. I get up, close my window and flop back into my chair.

I start googling where I can take the test and how much it will cost.

Next thing I know, I'm driving down the highway to a lab. The test, I'm told, is just a blood draw. I'd be fine with this, but I also hate needles, they scare me, not going to lie, they're pretty high up on my list of fears...

After they pull the needle out of my arm, I immediately run over to the trash can and hurl... regrettably, that's a pretty mild reaction from me; but I was grateful I made it to the can. I apologized profusely and they just waved it off, saying that was one of the many reasons they had trash cans in there in the first place. I thanked them once again on my way out after signing a check. They said it would be about a week until they mailed the results.

Upon getting home, I crashed onto the living room couch as my little sister's(Sam's) dog ran up to me, begging for attention. So I sat with the dog for a while and watched TV. That night, I fell asleep quickly, I guess I was more exhausted than I thought.

(8 days later)

I feel like I'm trapped inside some story, like a fan fiction or a movie, waiting for my friend to meet up with me. "We agreed to meet at 12:00 and it's 12:01! Omg all people do is lie!"

In other words, the large part of my brain was mad because the lab said a week and it had been just over a week. The logical half of me was thinking: so what? A week is just an estimate, and business is probably heavy right now.
But the rest of me was thinking: OMG they probably lost my results or decided not to send them or they sent them to the wrong person! Maybe the mail lost them is a sea of letters! Maybe the lab was too busy laughing at me and my fears!They were probably a group of vampires scamming people for blood!
Now, I know at least one of those wasn't true, our mail service is very reliable.

After like, 3 false alarms of the door bell ringing, once for my mom's package arrival, the second because my sister's girlfriend came over. And the third because my younger twin brothers were getting picked up for soccer! I then remembered that not all mail comes by the door, and decided to take Sam's dog, Alice the German Shepherd, on a walk to the mailbox .

"Well that was disappointing" I say to Alice on our walk back, she keeps trotting along, not listening. We get back home into the AC, and as I'm hanging her leash up, my dad comes around the corner with an envelope.
"Hey Chris this has your name on it" he holds out the envelope with two fingers and I take it from him
"Thanks dad" I say without looking up from the address. It reads the address of the lab. I practically tear it apart while trying to open it as I make my way to sit down at the table. I flip open the flap and pull out the paper.
After close reading, re-reading, and re-reading some more, I just banged my head on the table. The letter read that my results had been collected, and the date I could come in the learn them were as follows. What the Hell! I wanted results not a summon dammit! I read the date, and was slightly relieved since it was tomorrow. I couldn't sleep that night, too overwhelmed, anxious, or something.

The next day I drove over and signed in. They explained how they were going to put me through something of a VR experience, and if I was too overwhelmed just push this button etc. so I sat down in the chair and slid the goggles over my eyes.
I hope you're sitting because, well let's just say, it's weird. The second I put the set over my eyes, a word came together before me and I was transported into my past.

I apparently used to live in Europe, I had just visited the doctors for a penicillin shot, I guess I was sick; but as it turns out, I was allergic and when I got home, I wasn't feeling well. (I guess that's where the needle fear came from) So I took a walk through the woods near my house. Despite it being November at the time, I was too sweaty from my reaction to need a coat, I kept walking. Suddenly, a great tit landed in front of me, I guess I was a fan of birds back then because I slowly reached out to touch it. And that was my fatal mistake. Obviously, this bird wasn't about to be touched so it tried to fly off, but despite its efforts, it flew right into me! I had grabbed it gently to let it fly off, but the next thing I knew, I couldn't breathe, my hands were swollen and I couldn't stand upright. I fell over on my side, my legs going bow legged, and my arms being too weak to catch my fall. As my eyes slowly closed, I saw the black and yellow bird fly off. I choked out once or twice more, and that was it. The screen went black.
Needless to say, I was pretty shaken having just been through my last death, but I couldn't help but feel laughter bubbling up, allergies killed me. Not getting stabbed by a ten inch needle, or suffocated from a giant Tit in my face. Man, that's kinda sad.
I once again thanked the lab people and left to the next doctor to get an allergy test done.

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Thx for reading! I may or may not publish next week, my next story will have more of a romance theme.
Word count: 1393