MESSED | ATEEZ ✔

TWELVE

San POV

Suck my life!

I thought if I remaining to avoided her I will get much better. I didn't know what was she done to me. But everything about her make something inside me which was I don't know where the exact part has turning on.

She came to me this night and it's really not in the good time. I told her to leave but she doesn't follow my demanded. I can't hold it anymore. I want her so bad. I want her to be official mine. All mine. But I already aware about the consequences. So, my half body saying for not continued what I want to do but the other half said just go get her if not I will regret it.

I tried to not listen both. So, I asked her what should I do then? I hopeless. If she said I and her cannot being together then I gave up. It's useless if I am the only one who want her that bad. But suddenly the answer turn to otherwise which was I didn't expected she will gave that kind of answer.

She want me to kiss her? Really?

I made my way toward her. I staring her eyes and asked if she really mean it before kissing her and she just nodded. So, I put my lips on her without any hesitated. I moaning small when my lips touched her. This was the tasted that I craving for awhile.

I quickly deepens the kiss and pulled her closer to me. It became heated really fast and the atmosphere in that room became hot and stiff. My head are really messed and I couldn't thinking straight. As I slipped my tongue into her mouth making her let out a small moan. I smirked. Her arm was wrapped around my neck, I open my eyes a little to take a look her beauty face when she was enjoying the pleasure I gave her.

Suddenly her hands was going down to my pants which was make me gasp. I tugs lightly her bottoms lips before pulling away. I grabbed her hand to stopped her from doing that.

"Don't please..."

"Why?"

We both full of lust and really high. Craving for each other body. Wanna tasted every inches part of us. But there was something make me to stop. This is not the right way. I shaked my head slowly and take a look on her. She looked bewildered.

"You might not know how bad I want you right now but I can't. You're special to me and I wanted to treating you like a special one. Not like this. This is not the right time, not yet." I replied her question.

"If you want me just come to me. You don't need to listened what will other saying or what will they thinking. If it all about the rules, why not you just thrown that shit away from your thoughts. Can you?" She asked me.

"I really want to pushed that away. But it's not easier like what we're thinking. It involves everyone especially Seonghwa. I respect him and I don't want to become a betrayer." I said and pulling her away.

"Then don't. Don't tell them. We can go through this together. Just me and you. I'm okay with that." Her eyes telling me that she's not lying.

"No,  you don't understand. It's too complicated Seohyun. You will getting hurt and I really hated that. Nevermind just can you wait for me? I will find the way for us. For making this things real." I eagerly asked her for understanding my situation.

"I— I don't know San but I'll try." She replied.

I can saw her eyes disappointed a bit. The emotion shown on her face make me felt bad. I come closer to her again and give a kiss to her forehead and going down to her nose. I smiling to her which was want to telling her I really meant that. She just smile slushy.

I pecked her lips a little and make my lips going down to her neck. I buried my face on her neck. I can felt she flinched a bit. There was her sweet spot. I smirk a little. I put my lips and suck her neck soft but still managed to get some bruised of hickey.

San...

I love the way she moaning my name when I touched her sensitive part. The sound just making me for to go further. But I need to stop. Again. I licked a little at the hickey and pulled her away.

"Sorry for that hickey I can't holding myself for not doing that. You really attracting me. For now just go back to your room and sleep. It's quite late now. Sorry for having you like this time. But thank you asked me for the kisses. It's help me much." I softly rubbing her cheek with my thumb. Admiring her face.

How beautiful she created to be.

After she going out from my room, I felt like a heavy burden has come out from my body. I feel relieved when I tell her what I've been feeling for so long even a little. I'm happy because I know that it's not just me having this kind of feeling. But to make her mine I needed to figure out the things with myself.

How?

That's the question. What if Seonghwa really doesn't like me to having his sister as my girlfriend? What if I ruined his relationship with Seohyun? What if everyone hate me because I know it's not just me have this feeling with her.

I'm confusion.

___

San just confessed his feeling to me. Which was make me felt a little afraid. It's been a long time since I am in relationship. Last time I got, it's turn out bad and I'm the one who was getting hurt after all. I asked San for kissing me and it's really insane. I'm insane. I'm not that desperate but it just come out from my thoughts. I'm shit scared now.

Meanwhile I rushed out from San's room I bumped into someone chest. I'm shocked. I make my chin up and take a look who was the person. It's Yeosang. He looked sleepy. He rubbing his eyes and looking at me confusion.

"Seohyun why are you going out from there?" He asked me while pointing his finger to San's room.

"I-i-i need to return something to him. Yes that things." I replies stutter.

"Things? What was that?" He asked.

"Em money?" I rolling my eyes and thinking what should I gave him a reason. I biting my lips nervous. I put my hands on my neck perhaps he didn't notice it. He just nodded and want to walk away but then he stop me.

"Wait, why you covering your neck? Are you hurt?" He asked and almost make me choked. This Yeosang really make me want to die now.

"N-no I'm just tired. Yeosang-ah... I felt sleepy now and I really want to go bed. Excuse me please." I said while yawning a bit.

"Okay, sorry good night." He chuckles and smile a little then ruffled my hair before he walk away. I touched my hair and smile after that.

He always like this soft person or what?

I shaking my head and get in to my room. Seohyun wake up this not the time for admiring someone right now. You are in trouble. Trouble with your own feelings. Trouble with the thing you already aware about it. You're done. I'm immersed with my own thoughts.