Love Letters

The unbearable

The bright white lights are shining on my face as I walk down a white aisle covered in red rose petals wearing a sparkly white dress and holding pink pastel flowers. I look across from me; Sammy is standing in a tuxedo looking handsome as his eyes sparkle while he looks at me. On the other side was Amanda wearing a light purple dress holding flowers, she's my bridesmaid. I look to my sides, there are people sitting and clapping. I walk and stand in front of Sammy. I feel scared, am I getting married? No way, not with Sammy I'm not. Sammy reaches his hands out and holds mine. I look to my side and in the front row seat, Andrew is there clapping and smiling. I feel the sparks fly around Sammy and me as the minister's words turn into muffled noise. "Wake up, Emma. Wake up!" I mumble as I close my eyes really tight.

"Samuel Troy, do you take Emma Evans to be your wife?" The minister asks.

Sammy looks at me with a pretty grin, "I do."

At this point I feel sorry for him, he looks so damn pretty and I don't want to forget everything we've been through but my heart is still holding on to him and it's beating really loud. Very loud that it will break through my skin and fall next to my feet.

"Emma Evans, do you take Samuel Troy to be your husband?" The minister asks.

"I," I stutter. "Emma! Wake the hell up! Now!" I mumble a bit louder but no one hears me except me.

"Emma," I hear a familiar voice whisper in my ear. I turn around. Amanda was looking worried, "Say something," she says as I look back at Sammy who is now looking worried as well.

"Sorry Sammy," I say out loud. "But you hurt me and I'm not willing to waste the rest of my life on you," I say as I throw the engagement ring on him and I hear the crowds gasp. I hold my dress up a bit to help me not trip and I run back down the aisle and out the doors. I run down the streets of New jersey like a crazy person. "I'm free and I'm not turning back!"

I jump out of bed as I shake, "I knew it, it was just a dream," I let out a sigh of relief.

            I park at the half-empty parking lot across the university. I get out and close my car door. I turn around and Sammy is blocking my way. He's wearing a white gauze wrap around his head and he has a scratch on his right cheek.

"Sammy, get out of my way," I say calmly.

"Can I talk to you?" He says.

"I told you yesterday we are over," I say.

"I know but it's not about us," he starts. "It's Amanda."

"I don't want to talk about her either," I say as I try to walk away but he's still standing in my way.

"Amanda... isn't with us anymore," he stutters.

"I know she said she's going to see her family out of town for Christmas," I say.

"No, Amanda... passed away," Sammy struggles to say. My eyes start to tear up slowly as he said those words.

"What..." I fall back on my car and slide down to the ground of the parking lot. Sammy gets down to my level. "She didn't, you're lying!" I say as I push him around and he doesn't stop me.

"Emma calm down," he says as he puts his hand on my shoulder.

"How? No, she can't leave me," I cry. I start remembering everything we've been through. I don't want to believe it, it's not true.

"Last night she saw me drunk on the side of the road so she picked me up and we got into a big accident with a truck," Sammy says and then explains more of what happened as I'm crying thinking about her and only about her.