No one had seen it coming. The accident was sudden and the drunk driver was left without a scratch. Sam was killed instantly from the impact.
I remember when his mom called me. We talked often, but usually through text about random things so I knew something wasn't right.
I felt my heart drop as she sobbed into the phone. A year strolling down my cheek as she tried to get the words out. Jake and Corey were asking me what was wrong, but I could barely hear them when she said it.
I couldn't speak, I couldn't die anything. It felt like the world was stopping. Like it was ending.
I had dropped to my knees and sobbed. I didn't know if I could've done anything else. I didn't know if I could ever go on with my life without them.
Jake and Corey tried to talk to me, but I couldn't do it. They took the phone and spoke to his mom instantly showing their shock and tears.
I couldn't stay there and I didn't want to stay there. I ran as far as I could as I cried my heart out. I felt as if I couldn't wait to die now, to be with him.
When I walked into our house, it felt wrong. Knowing that he would never be back. Knowing I would never see him again. Knowing I would never be able to say I love you again.
I went to our bed and I saw the little box that I had been waiting to give him. I had waited too long. I was just so scared. So worried he would've said no, but I had always known he would've said yes.
I took the box and opened it seeing the ring that I knew would've fit him so well. I knew he would've loved it and he would've bragged about it to everyone he knew. I smiled at the thought, but it was fine as quick as it came knowing that would never come true.
I kept the box close to my chest as I got into bed. I touched his side as if he was going to be there.
Tear stains were already evident on my pillow and my eyes were bloodshot. I didn't stop crying that night. Not till I fell asleep. When I woke up it felt like I was worse then the day before.
Everything set in. This was real. Sam was gone. Forever. I felt my heart ache as a new round of tears came down my face. They didn't stop even when my friends came to check on me. I didn't speak or even look at them. It seemed that I could do was cry and so I did. They eventually left, but they said they would be back with food.
I wanted to be alone. I wanted to be with Sam. I wanted to ask him to marry me. I wanted him to be next to me.
********************
The funeral was difficult to sit through. Everyone was there. All of his friends and family. I had felt numb, but delicate. It was like if anyone asked how I was doing, I would break.
They asked me to speak, but I couldn't do it. His parents understood, but they asked me to write something for someone to read. I accepted knowing I owed that to them. That I wanted to do it for Sam.
I cried. Like I had done so many times before. I cried when the funeral was over, when his mom asked how I was. When my friends asked how I was.
"I was going to propose." I said weakly to his mom, who wiped my freshly fallen tears from my cheeks. She smiled lightly and nodded.
"I know." I gave her a confused look and she let out a small laugh as a tear slipped down her face.
"He has seen the ring in your closet." I was shocked to say the least. I thought I had been careful, but Sam had always been one to snoop.
"He was so happy. I remember he called me and he wouldn't stop talking about how in love he was with you. He was so excited for you to ask and he was so excited to say yes." I let out a sob causing her to wrap her arms around me.
"I waited too long." I said to her and she shook her head as she looked at me sadly.
"Colby, it didn't matter if you proposed or not. He loved you so much and you loved him so much. He knew that too and he was happier then I've ever seen him." I smiled at her and let the rest of my tears fall.
"I'm so sorry. I feel like I should be strong, but I can't do it."
"No one's asking you to be strong right now. He was the love of your life. That's not something you can get over in an instant." I hugged her again and talked to his father before I left.
I wasn't sure where I was going, but I found myself in a field. I knew she was right. I wasn't going to get over this soon or ever. Sam was the love of my life. He was my other half. My soulmate.
I took his ring out of my pocket and took out the chain I had picked up. I put the chain through the ring and wrapped it around my neck.
Sam was the best part of me. He was someone who deserved the world and more. I wanted to give that to him, but I wasn't able to.
Sam Golbach was who I had waited my whole life for. I couldn't help but think that if I had proposed earlier things would be different. Maybe he would still be here. But I waited and I'll have to live with that.
I'll be waiting for him. I'll be waiting to see him. I'll wait for you forever, Sam Golbach. The love of my life.
A/N: This is sad but I got the idea from a different story that made me sob this morning so...
