rachel

part 24

Matt called to let me know that he was running late. Our easy life brings me so much joy. After a long day at work we come home, make dinner together, enjoy each other's company. Make love. 

I still find it hard to believe that this life is real and that it's mine. That he's with me and not with someone else. He's so perfect I often feel undeserving. He always finds a way to make me feel otherwise. 

I'm chopping carrots for the stir fry I'm making. I've got a glass of wine and an Audioslave Pandora channel playing. Dancing in the kitchen is one of my favorite things to do. My bare feet and hips move to the beat of the song. I'm in my happy place. 

I dance over to the fridge to pull out a head of broccoli. The second that I close the door to the fridge I see him.

Jace.

I suck in a quick burst of air and the broccoli drops from my hands. Shock. My immediate flight response kicks in. Jace is too quick. He moves to the cutting board and grabs my knife. I back up quickly until my back hits wall. He's got the knife pointed at me.

"Hey Rach. I see you still have a fine fucking ass. When you swing it around the way you do I get so fucking hard."

"How? How..how are you here?"

"Well, it's fucking good to see you too, bitch." My hands immediately go in the air. I plead with my eyes and with everything that I am for my safety.

"Jace. What do you want?" I'm such a fucking idiot. Matt tells me to lock the door, over and over. I basically just welcomed this fucking psycho right into our home. 

"Well, I need money. I know that Matt has some. I figured I'd stop by and pay him a quick visit." He looks me up and down, slowly, he stops at my breasts and then my crotch. It makes me want to vomit.

"When's he coming home? Thought he'd be here by now. It's really unfortunate he's making me wait." He looks like shit. He's aged horribly and I can tell he's in really bad shape. If he didn't have a knife I could probably outrun him.

"He should be home any minute. Please just put the knife down. It's not necessary." I desperately hope that what I've told him isn't a lie. Every fiber of my being is begging him to put the knife down. To leave and to come back when Matt is here. To be distracted enough that I can call for help in some way. To leave me the fuck alone.

"So you and Matt huh? Finally ended up together. Fucking happily ever after?" He swings the knife around and takes a step closer to me. My breathing is labored and Jace watches my chest heave up and down. His eyes move south to my hand. He spots my ring and his eyes light up.

"Listen, Rach. I need that ring. Take it off... now." I'd rather him take my ring than anything else from me. I slide it off and throw it across the kitchen. He can go get it.

"tsk tsk tsk. Shouldn't have done that Rachel." His hand comes up so fast and meets the side of my face in a solid slap. Hitting women doesn't seem to faze him. I'm sure hitting people in general is a common practice for him. Both of my hands cup my cheek. It feels as though it's on fire.

"While we wait, I'm going to need to you to take care of this." He grabs hold of his dick in one hand. I make sure to not even look. I shake my head 'no' while staring him right in the eyes. 

"Back the fuck off Jace." Jesus, where the fuck is this courage coming from? My cheek is on fire, I have tears streaming uncontrollably down my face, and a fucking psycho standing in front of me and now is when courage decides to stand up? I surprise myself as mush as I surprise Jace.

"Fuck me. This new fight is fucking sexy as fuck." He takes two steps towards me. He's right in my face. I turn mine away from his. I want to punch and kick and scream and fight for my life but I know how much of a psycho he really is and I know that he won't shy away from using the knife in his hand. 

He grabs my wrist and twists it behind me fast. It spins me so that my front is against the wall and his dick is right up against my ass. He puts his face in my hair and takes a deep breath in. He then moves his face to my ear.

"I bet you're naughty in bed." He whispers this and I can feel his stale breath against my cheek. 

"Jace, get off of me. I'm going to scream and my neighbors will hear." Our neighborhood is quiet. The houses are spaced apart about 50 feet. It would take quite a bit of screaming in order for someone to hear and think to do something.

"You won't. You know why? Because I'll fucking slice you from ear to ear." He wouldn't. He wouldn't. He wouldn't. I close my eyes and run these words through my mind. How long has it been? 5 minutes? An hour? I pray that Matt will walk in the door any minute. 

"That's my girl. No need to fight." He puts the knife down on the counter. It's out of my reach but I contemplate if I can fight him off in some way before he is able to pick it back up again. Do I fight? Do I wait for Matt? 

"Jace. Please. Matt will get you the money you need. You don't need to do this." I decide that I'm going to try reason. His free hand snakes around my waist to my stomach. He tries to slide it down into the front of my pants. Fucking reason doesn't work with psychos, I should have known this. He steps closer to me so that he has more leverage for sliding his hand down my jeans.

"Rach, use your free hand to unbutton your jeans." This is whispered in my ear. 

"No."

"Fucking bitch." He grabs the knife from the counter and spins me back to facing forward. He backs up a step and let's go of my wrist. "Take your pants off now." The knife is pointed at my face. I glance down and my hands are shaking. Tears stream down my face. 

"Save the fucking tears for Matt. Tears don't mean shit to me. Pants off now. Take your shirt off too." His eyes are black. They're soulless. I've seen them many times before. He's ruthless and doesn't give two shits about it. My shaking hands grab the hem of my shirt and pull it over my head. I drop my shirt to the floor. My eyes meet his.

"Jace." I take a breath in. "Please." 

"Pants." 

More tears. My breathing becomes shortened. An iron fist presses hard against my chest. A panic attack is just around the corner. It's as if my anxiety has taken a human form and is standing right in front of me. The fear that I battle to keep at bay every day stands before me. Weakens me. 

My shaking hands go to the button of my jeans. I undo the button and my fingers fumble. I get my zipper down. Black spots appear in my peripheral. I feel lightheaded and as if I'm about to fall to the floor.

I can't see through the tears.

The door opens and shuts and it makes me jump.