1. That awkard moment when someone is crying and you're trying not to laugh.
2. You gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp & kill a cat.
3. That depressing moment when the person you hate is breathing
4. Time flies when you're throwing watches.
5. "I just saw you on tv!" "OMG which channel?" "Animal planet..............."
6. When I die I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
7. Apple and Blackberry should team up and make a phone called Pie.
8. I'm not saying I hate you, but if you were on fire....................................I'd roast marshmallows.
9. S.C.H.O.O.L. - Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives
10. C.L.A.S.S. - Come Late And Start Sleeping
11. H.O.M.E.W.O.R.K. - Half Of My Energy Wasted On Random Knowledge
12. F.I.N.A.L.S. - Fuck, I Never Actually Learned Shit.
13. Why is 'Patience' a virtue? Why can't 'Hurry the fuck up' be a virtue?
14. Let's all take a moment and be thankful that spiders or lobsters can't fly.
15. Sees a bug outside: 'Hello Mr. Bug, I think I may have conquered my bug phobia." Sees a bug inside: "ARGH! KILL IT! KILL IT! DIE! DIE! ARGH! IT MOVED!'
16. When we vote for a story on Wattpad, does anyone know what we are actually voting for?
It's not rated PG - 13 but my computer won't let me put it lower.
YOU ARE READING
Funny facts about life
HumorApparently these things I think up are funny. Everyone says so at school so why not post them on wattpad?