Romanogers One-Shots 2

Pushing You Away

Requested by snowwinter19, Natasha has a disease and is dying so she pushes Steve away but they eventually find their way to each other. Quick warning, this talks about terminal illnesses.

It was ironic really. 

The great Black Widow dying of something cooked up in a lab thirty years ago. 

She had found out about two months ago. She'd gotten shot during a mission and while getting it stitched up at SHIELD, they'd noticed an abnormality in her blood pressure. 

So they ran more test and came back hours later telling her that there was some kind of long lasting poison in her blood. 

According to the doctors, it was slowly destroying her organs and they thought it to have been from her days in the Red Room. 

It made sense. The Red Room had always been paranoid of their Widows betraying them. Poisoning them without their knowledge would be a failsafe. 

Upon more research, Natasha found that some of the other Widows that had left before her were now dead of unknown illnesses. 

From what she found, she had less then a year before the poison would shut her body down completely. 

Natasha demanded that none of the Avengers find out about it though. Right now she was still technically healthy and she wasn't about to be benched from missions because of this. 

The only issue was that there was one Avenger in particular who was always overly observant and who seemed to notice every damn change she had. 

It didn't help that she was also dating him.

Steve would be devastated. It was no secret that he loved her and she was certainly in love with him, though she'd never admitted it out-loud. 

Her dying would destroy him. Especially in this way. 

So Natasha came up with a plan. It was by no means a good one, and she absolutely hated what she'd have to do. But in her mind it was the only way to save Steve's heart in the long run. 

She'd have to make him hate her so he'd miss her less when she was gone. 

It was harder than she expected though. 

The same night that she had found out about the poison, Steve showed up at her apartment to make sure that she was alright. 

"Hey," She said softly when she saw him at the door, her heart already breaking at the thought of him hating her. 

Steve smiled, "Hey. How are you?" 

Natasha shrugged, "Fine. A little sore but nothing I can't handle." 

"I don't doubt that," Steve said with a small smile as Natasha stepped aside to let him in. 

She shrugged, "Are you alright? You took a pretty good beating there after I was down." 

Steve nodded, "A few bruises here and there but nothing serious." 

Natasha frowned, "You got lucky. If Clint wasn't there to cover you we'd both be dead." 

Steve shrugged, "You're worth the risk Nat. I couldn't live with myself if you died and I could have done something about it." 

Natasha winced slightly, turning away from him and walking into her living room. He was already making this harder on her. 

Steve frowned and grabbed her wrist gently, "What's going on Natasha?" 

Natasha shook her head, pulling her wrist away and sitting down on her couch, "Nothing. I'm fine."