Oscillation | [H.S]

Chapter 31

Time changes everything unstoppably. Sometimes in a positive way, sometimes in a negative way. The blisters on my body healed pretty quickly, only taking five days. My hair was fixed within ten minutes, as Harry let Nova come over to style it the next day. I still wasn't in the mood to say much but luckily Nova understood me. She cut my hair, gave me a soft kiss on the top of my head and left.

I couldn't stop looking at the girl in the mirror afterwards, a strange body that didn't resemble me at all. I observed every piece of skin and kept trying to find life in the dead eyes that stared back at me. It's hard to look for something that isn't there. After a while, Harry came upstairs to look for me and took away my frozen body. Without a word he had put me into his bed and cuddled me to warm me up. I wasn't able to respond.

The problem was the constant fight of my feelings and my thoughts. I had so much time to think. Because to be totally honest, I was deadly afraid of Harry but I couldn't stay away. I needed his soft touches, caring words and his presence. However, it was still Harry.

Beside his soft touches came harsh grips. His caring words could change devilishly, ripping me to pieces. And his presence scared me to dead. Every time he walked into the room I tensed up. I could feel my senses become hyperactive. And maybe that was the reason I melted into him as soon as he came close. His delicious smell, his warmth, his beauty.

"Kitten?" The deep voice pulled me away from my chain of thoughts. My cheek stuck to the window for a brief moment when I looked up to Harry. He was wearing nothing but a pair of shorts and shoes. The skin of his chest was glistering in the sunlight because of the slight sheen of sweat. He had been working out. I stared at the butterfly on his belly, my head fuzzy.

"When was the last time you showered?" His words echoed through my head. I had to lift my eyes up to his face but I couldn't. The butterfly was moving, trying to get off his skin. The butterfly became larger, until it almost touched my nose. Harry's long fingers wrapped around my chin, lifting my head.

"Emma?" He repeated again, trying to catch my attention with my real name. Slowly, my eyes moved to his. The piercing green was almost electric. "What did you take?"

I was hoping that Harry would have left me alone today, as he had done the past days, so he wouldn't have noticed that I had found my way to his medicine cabinet a few days ago. I had been careful, never taking too much, but today my thoughts were so busy, I thought another three pills wouldn't hurt. It hadn't hurt. I felt totally numb, which was all I wanted.

"Did you break into Niall his room?" Harry continued asking questions, turning my head from left to right.

"No." I whispered, the word rolling of my tongue and making it sound weird. It made his eyebrows frown. He removed his hand from my face, wrapping his hands around my hands instead. He pulled on them a bit, encouraging me to stand up. I rolled my eyes, annoyed at him for bothering me.

"Don't roll your eyes at me." He spoke immediately. "Just stand up."

With frowned eyebrows I obeyed, hoping that he would stop bothering me afterwards. The floor was moving a bit and I stumbled. If Harry hadn't tightened his grip on my arm, I would have fallen. I heard him sigh deeply. His hands left mine, making me sack down onto the windowsill. He strode out of the room, coming back not much later with the package of pills in his hands.

"How many did you take today?" Harry questioned me sternly but surprisingly not angry. I slowly stuck up my outstretched hand to show him I had taken five. His jaw clenches immediately, fisting the package in his hand harshly.

"Fuck!" He hissed between his teeth. His eyes scanned my body once more, probably searching for a reaction that I couldn't give. He paced around the room a few times, hands clenched at his sides.