Oscillation | [H.S]

Chapter 19

The numbers on the digital clock on the nightstand signed me that it was merely six-thirty in the morning, but Harry had already disappeared from the bed. Unconsciously I let my hands glide over my body, checking if all the clothes were still there. Harry hadn't touched me any further than just holding me tightly.

And I hated to admit it but being held by him chased the nightmares away, even though he was the one that caused them. I guess my body was just looking for comfort.

I rolled out of bed and walked over to the ensuite to freshen up. My long brown hair was a tangled mess and it took me quite some time to untangle it. I brushed my teeth, washed my face and applied some cream that I found near the sink on my face.

It wasn't hard to decide what I wanted to wear today, automatically grabbing a new pair of sweat pants and a sweater. I also grabbed a new pair of underwear and dressed myself slowly. When I finished, I let my gaze scan through the curtains but it was still dark. I had been taken around the beginning of January so it must be somewhere in February now. A whole month and nobody had found me yet. Not that I expected them to put up a thorough search for an orphan.

My body spun around quickly when I remembered that I was free to leave the room now. Tentatively, I walked up to the door and pushed the handle down. It gave in. Again, the surge of adrenaline surged through me when I realised my freedom. With a small on my face I started exploring the mansion on my tippy toes, afraid anyone would discover me.

After about an hour I had ended up in the kitchen, which was linked to the large dining room. I had picked a banana and an apple from the scale full of fruits that stood on the counter of the kitchen and was observing the room with large eyes. It was very spacious and obviously made for being cooked in extensively. Yet, it was also so spotless and pristine that it looked like it hadn't been touched ever.

When finished my food, I walked through the large dining room onto the living room, which was just as spacious. Harry had a surprisingly good taste in interior. The couches were large and black, surrounding an enormous television screen. One of the walls was completely made out of windows.

Now that it was beginning to get light outside, I walked up to them and quietly enjoyed the view. The sun was rising with warm colours above the high trees, creating a golden glow over the garden. I could feel the warmth of the burning star on my face, even though February was a cold month. My hand drifted to the door handle, just resting on it and wishing feverishly I could step outside and breath in the cold morning air. I realised only now how desperately I missed being able to go outside. It had been so long.

"Trying to escape?" A husky voice echoed through the room, making me whip around. Zayn was seated on the black couch, dressed in a black suit with the tie undone and his red-rimmed eyes bore into mine. My breath hitched upon seeing the darkness in them. It was even worse than Harry.

I shook my head, squeaking out a small 'no'. My eyes scanned the room quickly and I realised that I was really all alone with him. He swiftly stood up from the couch, approaching me like a tiger approached his pray. My heart was beating painfully against my ribs.

I was frozen and the only movement I could make was a harsh flinch when his hands came to rest on either side of the window next to my head. Up close, his eyes were dark brown with the sun emphasising the golden speck, surrounded by long and thick lashes that casted the dark shadows. He had a proper beard now instead of the heavy stubble he had when I saw him last.

That was at Louis's when he had winked at me when I almost died, casually enjoying my pain. This man was absolutely dangerous and he was good at it. The memory of him shooting Mr. Acker shot through my head. Or him abusing the man that wanted to molest me by stomping his shot wound. Zayn knew how to torture, I was sure about that.

"What would Harry think about that, hmm?" He spoke softly. The smell of cigarettes and alcohol entered my nostrils. I turned my head to the side, avoiding his smell and piercing gaze. His strong hand immediately shot up and grabbed my jaw tightly, turning my head back. I swallowed the lump in my throat, tears already welling up in my eyes.

"I wasn't escaping." I protested while trying to free myself from his strong grasp with no positive result. He merely tightened his grip, wrinkling his nose at my words.

"Escaping and lying.. Harry hasn't really taught you well, has he?" Zayn smirked and licked his lips, stepping closer to me. His hand kept a tight grip on my jaw as his other hand moved away from next to my head. My eyes widened at the actions and I squirmed in his grip. His touch came unexpected, his fingers tracing my collarbone lightly.

And then he pressed down on the hickey that Harry made yesterday. I yelped in pain.

"You look nice, being marked like this." He whispered, his mouth close to my ear. "Although I would mark you more. Leave you all bruised and helpless."

When he stood upright again, he smirked at my expression. I didn't even dare to breathe. Harry was evil, sure, but that totally differed from this man. He made me wish Harry was here.

"I bet you look amazing in handcuffs." He continued easily, his free hand gliding down to my butt and squeezing it harshly. He hummed in appreciation.

"And then I would fuck you until you'd cry." His hand drifted up again and his the rough skin of his thumb stroked my cheek, removing the tears that were now silently flowing. "You're pretty when you cry."

And suddenly he released me and stepped back. I gasped in relieve and curled in on myself. My eyes didn't dare to meet his.

"Sadly you are Harry's now. I'll ask for a turn though. You'll probably step out of line soon enough." And with that, he walked around me and slid the door made of glass open. Once outside he lit up a cigarette, taking a long drag and letting the smoke swirl out towards the sky.

I turned around on my heels and walked to Harry's room as quickly as I could. The door slammed behind me and I slid down against it, breathing heavily. The panic finally started to settle. The threat of Zayn was very clear. I couldn't afford stepping out of line with Harry again or Zayn would have his way with me.

My stomach turned and I ran to the toilet just in time to empty the contents of my stomach. I curled up on the cold floor and remembered Harry's words from the first day.

'I can make you afraid of living'

He was right. Maybe I'd rather be dead than alive.