Prince next door (Prinxiety au)

Chapter 4

When Virgil walks inside of his apartment, he sees his roommate and his friends are still up as well. Because of course they are. It's like they never sleep.
"Virgil!" Marten, his only official roommate, calls him in the common room. Virgil sighs subtly before forcing a smile on his face as he turns around to face him. Leaning against the door post between the hallway and common room.
"Yeah?" He questions.
"Did you just get out of town? Is it still busy?" All four men look at him expectantly. Virgil crosses his arms. For some reason it's always cold in their common room.
"I wouldn't know, didn't go into town." He admits with a shrug. Already ready to turn around again.
"Oh okay. You and your friend wanna join us? We're going to check for ourselves." The other man calls. Stopping Virgil in his tracks. How are they still going out? It's already half past three.
"No, I'm good and he went home. Have fun though." He waves them goodbye before they can say anything else. It's only when he finally closes the door of his room behind him that he feels the exhaustion pull at him. With drooping eyes and slow movements he changes into his pajamas and checks his phone a last time before hopefully falling asleep. An involuntary smile pulls at the corner of his lips when he sees Roman already send him a message saying he really liked tonight and hopes he didn't disrupt Virgil's sleeping schedule too much. With a frustrated sigh by how little it took for him to allow Roman in his life again he starts to finally follow the other man back on social media. He won't answer his message though. Not until tomorrow or something. He doesn't want the former boy next door to think he just forgave and forgot everything that has happened between the two of them. But somewhere in his heart he knows he actually finally started that process.

The next day and almost all the days after that Roman comes up to him more and more at school and Virgil allows it. It's odd how it still feels familiar to talk with his former best friend and just be around him. He gives him new energy. The more he lets himself react genuine, like he has wanted to again ever since they broke apart, the more it feels like there haven't been years of awkward and painful distance between them. But he remains careful. He's glad to have Roman back, but he's wary the other man will leave again once he runs out of nostalgia and they'll have to actually make a new friendship to build further on. He allows himself to be temporarily happy and naive, but in the back of his mind he's already picking up the pieces of his heart again.
"So I was thinking. Maybe we can go out and grab something to eat tonight?" The older man suggests when they're once again standing in the hallway in front of Virgil's classroom door.
"Yeah, sure. Not something too fancy though." He warns. He's not counting every dollar he spends, but he's also not in the position to waste it.
"Oh yeah no, I was thinking Chinese maybe. Something student loan friendly." The older man smirks. Virgil snickers softly.
"Aight. Text me when you want to go." Virgil waves him goodbye by doing a two finger salute and walking into class. He's not necessarily having the best day, but ever since they've been hanging out together again, Virgil doesn't want Roman to worry. The other man hasn't brought up the night they re-met nor asked what happened. He said they didn't have to talk about it so they don't, but Virgil can see how his eyes linger when he's too slow at putting on his 'I'm fine' mask. He notices how carefully he treads around the subject. With a deep sigh he plumbs down in his chair and takes out his laptop. Because of the force, his pens tumble out of his backpack as well. Frustrated, he casts his laptop aside and bends down to pick them up again. When he's finally seated and tries to open his laptop, he notices its battery is dead. For some reason that upsets him beyond any reasonable explanation. Tears jump in his eyes and he clenches his jaws as he searches for his charger. Upon noticing he doesn't have it with him, a sudden panic falls over him. He can't be without his laptop right now. Not today. It feels as if breathing gets harder and his heart is trying to escape. Punching hard against his ribs. Before he can break down and cry he throws his stuff back in his backpack and leaves the room. Not stopping until he leaves the school as well and is safe in his own room where he finally lets it all out. It doesn't make sense, but he stopped questioning the why and only fears the when now. Panic attacks or dizzying cry fests being a reoccurring performance of his. After a while he calms down again. Now left with a hollow feeling. As if he's completely drained from emotions. He slowly takes out his headphones and distracts himself with music as he lays down in his bed and stares up at the ceiling. His phone vibrates on his chest and he realizes he must've already been laying like that for hours. Roman texting him about going out to eat. With the only energy left inside him he unlocks his screen and quickly types back that he can't come along anymore. Instantly Roman wonders why not. Virgil sighs and places the phone back on his chest. Why not? Because he can't face the outside world right now? Because he has no energy? Because he feels like he's already dead, but his brain doesn't seem to realize it yet? Eventually he just lies and says he has a bad headache. He feels his phone vibrate a couple more times, but doesn't look at it. He turns around and faces the wall as he curls up around his pillow. Tears stinging behind his eyes again. Haven't those dried up yet? He scrunches them close in an attempt to shut the voice out. Just do it. He clenches his hands into fists when the need to carve washes over him. The doorbell rings and Virgil crawls even deeper into a ball. Not ready to hear his loud roommate and his friends. A soft knock is heard on the door, but Virgil pretends to ignore it. He's playing music anyway, so it's believable. The knock sounds again accompanied with a voice he's surprised to hear.
"Virge?" Roman's voice sounds through the wooden door and his music. Virgil takes off a single earpiece to hear what the other man will do when he doesn't respond. The door opens softly and Virgil closes his eyes again. Please leave. Please leave me alone.
"Virgil, are you okay?" Roman steps inside and closes the door again. He hears how he steps closer. Stopping by his bed.
"Virge?" He asks and Virgil stiffens when he feels his hand on his shoulder.
"I'm fine. Just tired." He finally replies. Forcing himself to sit up and face him with a hopefully believable smile. Roman looks at him questioningly.
"Don't worry. The, uh, headache just wore me out and I decided to head to bed early." The younger man quickly adds to make it more believable. Roman looks at him for a few more moments in which Virgil tries his hardest to not let his smile falter. The other man lets out a sigh and he sits down on the bed.
"Your eye shadow has run out on your cheeks, Virge." He tells him softly. Virgil has to regain him for just a couple of seconds before he's smiling again. How could he not have thought of that?
"Oh uh, the headache got actually really bad and I uh, cried because of it." He lies again. Roman looks down at his lap. It's quiet for a few moments before the other man looks up at him again.
"Come on." He nods his head as he stands up again. Virgil's eyes widen in horror. He shouldn't have said the headache was over. Now he doesn't have an excuse to not go with him anymore.
"Uh, actually, the, uh, the headache is coming back I think. I should probably just stay at home." He tries. Roman lifts a single unimpressed eyebrow.
"You've always been a horrible liar." He sighs. "Look, I can guess why you don't want to just admit to me that you're having a hard time right now, but please don't lie to me." He begs. Virgil blinks surprised.
"Come on." Roman says again. Slowly Virgil shakes his head.
"I can't." He starts softly. Merely a whisper. "Sorry." He adds sincere. He often wishes he could just be normal. Roman then finally seems to run out of patience and walks away again. Virgil casts his gaze down as he tugs in his trembling lip. There indeed is a reason why he won't just talk to Roman, but it's not personal. Not really. He just knows no one understands. So what's the point in fooling himself? To his surprise he hears the tap in his bathroom being turned on and he snaps his head up again to see Roman walk out with one of his washcloths.
"Look up?" The other man orders gently and in pure confusion, Virgil listens. He startles when Roman starts to carefully wipe his cheeks with the cloth.
"You know, I really like this whole emo look on you, but maybe buy some waterproof eye shadow next time." The boy in front of him suggests with a jokey undertone. Virgil wants to laugh, cry and push him away all at the same time. Instead he clenches his hands into fists to control himself. Roman then dabs his cheeks dry with his sleeve before going back into the bathroom to hang the cloth away. Unsure of what to do, Virgil remains quiet.
"Scoot over, will you?" Roman waves him away when he comes back by his bed.
"I'm not good company right now." The younger man mutters softly.
"I know. I don't care. Scoot." Roman replies as he gestures again. Already stepping closer and picking up the corner of the covers to get underneath next to him. Virgil scoots closer to the wall, but opens his mouth to protest again.
"You don't have to say or do anything. You can do the exact same thing as you did before I came in, but you're not going to be alone." Roman interrupts him resolute. Virgil looks at him for the longest time before tears start to sting in his eyes again and he quickly looks away again. Wiping them away when they roll over his cheeks.
"Please, just leave." He begs softly.
"No." Roman replies as he gently tilts his chin to make him look at him again.
"I've seen you cry before, Virge. I know I haven't been there for you in too long, but allow me to be here for you now." He speaks up gently. Eyes pleading to not shut him out. Virgil lets out a sob and tries to look away again, but Roman wraps his arms around him and pulls him against his chest.
"I can't." Virgil tries to stop this, not even convincing himself. His arms already slowly wrapping around Roman's waist as well. Searching comfort even if his head isn't on board yet. Roman shushes him softly the same way he did that first night and Virgil slowly lets go off everything holding him back and starts to really curl up to the other man. Laying down with his head in Roman's lap as he tries to shut his brain off. Roman carts through his hair softly with one hand while he rests his other arm protectively around Virgil's shoulders.
"Here." He whispers as he sets the headphones that fell off earlier back on his head. Virgil doesn't want to cry again. He doesn't want to show how weak he is. He wants to be strong enough to sit up and put on his mask again. But he barely has the strength to lift his arm to his face, let alone carry that mask all day. Roman's hand in his hair, the soft strokes, it calms him down no matter what he tells himself. Hugging his former best friend calms him down. He's not sure how long they lay like that. One comforting the other, but suddenly Roman's stomach underneath Virgil's ear starts to rumble.
"Hungry?" He wonders.
"Nah, I'm good." The other man replies. His stomach telling a different story when it rumbles again. Virgil pushes himself up.
"Hey, no, you can stay down." Roman assures him quickly.
"You're hungry." Virgil states plainly. Sitting up to look amused at the man next to him. Roman opens his mouth to protest, but then lets out a chuckle.
"Yeah, okay, maybe I am." He finally admits.
"It's okay, I've already held you here for too long." Virgil comments. Finding just enough strength again to smile reassuringly.
"I'm not leaving." Roman states.
"Ro, you've gotta eat." Virgil frowns.
"I'll order something. We can eat together." Roman already takes out his phone.
"I'm not hungry." Virgil shakes his head. Roman eyes him for a second before shrugging.
"I'm still going to order Chinese." He simply declares. A genuine smile fights to pull up the corners of Virgil's lips. Roman is still stubborn as ever.
"You haven't changed a bit." He reacts fond. The past weeks he discovered that Roman still hasn't toned down his fantasy. That he's still very extroverted and has it very easy to come off as likable. It's like he's just hanging out with kid Roman, but both better and scarier because they're grown-ups now.
"Neither have you." Roman replies without looking up. Virgil frowns offended.
"Yes, I have. I'm nothing like I was as a kid." He defends himself. Roman looks up surprised by his tone.
"All the good things remained." He simply states before tapping away on his phone again. Virgil let's out a scoff. Not believing a word the other man is saying. Roman doesn't react. Too focused on the menu choices.
"Should I order the duck or king prawns?" He mutters to himself.
"I thought you didn't like prawns?" Virgil quirks a surprised eyebrow. Roman looks up with a smirk.
"Guess we all change, huh?" He responds before finally making a decision and ordering.
"Guess so." Virgil admits, barely audible. He's not sure what to do right now. He feels like a stranger inside his body. On the one hand he still feels awful and like crying constantly, while on the other he has that weird energy again from being around Roman. It confuses him and nothing he can think of would make him feel better. He just wants it to stop. He wants peace already.
"Hey, do you wanna watch a movie maybe?" Roman snaps him back from his gloomy thoughts. A movie? Maybe it'll be able to distract him from his own mind for a while.
"Sure." He gives in. Roman looks around for his laptop and Virgil remembers again what caused his initial break down.
"Wait." He stops the other man from getting out of bed to search it. Instead he climbs over Roman to go to his backpack and retrieving the silver device.
"It needs charging." He explains softly as he grabs the charger he forgot on the floor. He plugs it in the wall and his computer before handing it to Roman so he can crawl back into place. Safely between the wall and his old best friend.
"Alright. What movie do you want to watch?" Roman wonders with an excited smile.
"Doesn't matter. You can choose." Virgil waves the question away.
"Let's watch Oliver and Co! Like the old days!" Roman's eyes lit up when he proposes the idea. No way Virgil can say no to that. Not that he'd want that. He loves that movie.