No One But You

61. Courthouse

Madison

Our relationship with Freddie hadn't changed a wink since he came out to us - us being the band, Chrissie, Mary, and Veronica. Of course there was very slight tension between Freddie and Mary but naturally there always will be when there's a break up, it doesn't matter what the reason is. But Mary is handling it well. She cried a couple of nights and not because of Freddie's sexuality but because she really was in love with him. I believe she still is and perhaps she never will fall out of love. But I hope that the love can continue platonically. I don't want her to feel like she can't love Freddie if it isn't romantically. I think she's only just beginning to figure out how to do that.

I feel for her. If the love of my life didn't love me back, I don't know what I would do. And Mary's right. We can't even be mad at Freddie because it's not his fault. He's a wonderful human who's finding himself and I know both him and Mary will find their significant others at some point, but I still can't help but feel sorry for Mary. And I suppose Freddie too. It's a sticky situation that really shouldn't be as complicated as it is.

I worry for Freddie if the media or public finds out. He's stated that he doesn't want to openly come out about his sexuality, and I don't blame him. Unfortunately we live in a world where being gay means you're different. It means you're an outcast. It's ridiculous and I don't understand it, but Freddie wants to just play it out and let it come out naturally.

The one thing, however, that has everyone's panties in a twist is the fact that Freddie has taken a liking to Paul Prenter. A real liking. I had my suspicions but I couldn't have been prepared for this. No one could. Roger just about had a coronary when he found out and I don't blame him. Part of me wanted to strange Freddie just because Paul is such a shit human that literally no one can stand but Freddie.

"I just don't get it, Maddie," Roger says as the two of us drive through the streets of London.

I glance over at my fiancé. His blonde hair is a little shorter from me trimming it last night. I like it long but it was bordering on too long.

"If this is what I think it is -" I start but Roger cuts me off.

"Paul fucking Prenter just really knows how to grind my gears. I mean, who does he think he is? He can't just waltz in and take Freddie from us. He's changing him, Mads. Do you notice it? Because I do,"

I sigh. I do notice it. It's little things, like the way Freddie acts around us. Mary was much more involved with the lot of us but Paul demands all his attention and Freddie blindly gives it to him.

"I do, Rog. But what are we going to do? We can't break them up.." I say.

Roger huffs and shakes his head.

"I know. But maybe we can have an intervention," he suggests.

"And say what? 'Hey Freddie, hope everything is well. We just wanted to let you know we think your boyfriend is proper garbage and we don't want him around anymore'?"

"Yes-"

"No. We aren't saying that. Freddie...well, he's head over heels for him. We can't come in between that because it won't end well for us. If the boys came up and told you they hated me, how would you feel?"

"They wouldn't do that. They love you,"

I roll my eyes.

"But how would you feel if they did?" I push.

Roger hesitates before answering me. I notice him white knuckle the steering wheel as he drives, looking for a parking spot near the courthouse.

"I'd riot," he mumbles.