Growing Back Together

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I immediately run upstairs, and get into the shower. I can’t stop thinking about him, he looks so much better. I have to constantly remind myself he’s not my Peeta anymore, he hardly even remembers me, and what he does remember of me has been changed to make him think I’m some sort of monster. I’ll never have my boy with the bread again, and I’ll have to live with that for the rest of my life.

 The warm water reminds me of Peeta’s arms when they wrapped around me on the train. I feel myself slipping into the memory, I let it consume me, take me into my favorite place, anywhere with Peeta.

            I wake up screaming from a nightmare, sitting up, grabbing for anything that tells me I’m back in reality. My breathing is heavy and off pace, I’m clutching the bed sheets, and then Peeta runs in with terror looming in his bright blue eyes.

            “It was just a dream, I’m sorry.” I say breathless.

“It’s okay. I get them too,” he says. I look at him surprised I’ve never heard Peeta scream or seen him thrash around in terror, “Goodnight.” He says turning to walk back out the door, but I don’t want him to go. I can’t handle the nightmares. Not without him.

“Peeta,” I say still trying to catch my breath. He turns back toward me. “Will you stay with me?” I ask pleading him with my eyes.

“Yeah.” He says walking toward my bed. He climbs in putting his arm around me, and pulling me into to his chest. I embrace it, laying my head on his chest. “Always.” He says whispering to me. That one word sends a feeling through my body, one I’ve only felt once before, in the cave in the first games.

I force myself to grab hold of reality knowing that Peeta will never return to me, not really anyway. I step out of the shower and a cold breeze blows over me sending a shiver through my whole body. This is how I feel without him, cold and alone.

I wrap a towel around my naked body, and start to brush out my tangled hair. It takes half an hour to get it as good as I want it. I dry myself off, and throw on some clean clothes. The window is propped open, and I can hear him outside pulling the wheelbarrow around the side of my house, I tell myself he’s only doing this because he feels bad about Prim. She was such an amazing, likeable young girl, even a hijacked Peeta couldn’t resist liking her.

I run down the steps, and walk out the front door, the sun is starting to fall from the sky, I must have been inside longer than I thought. I walk around to where I heard Peeta he looks to me, even messier than before, dirt covers his hands, and there are smudges all over his face. I try to hide my smile from him.

“You’re a gardener now too?” I say.

He gives a small smile, “Do you like them?” he asks.

“Peeta they’re lovely.” I say looking down at the ones he’s already planted. “Thank you.” When he stands up i resist the urge to wrap my arms around his neck, and press his lips against mine. He begins to walk closer to me.

“I’ll finish these up tomorrow,” He says. “If that’s okay.” I want to tell him to stay with me again. I want to tell him that I can’t handle this without him, but he has his own problems to deal with, so all I say is,

“That’s fine.” He gives me a little smile, and starts to push the wheelbarrow away. I feel my heart sink into my stomach, and a lump come up in my throat, I can’t stand to watch him go.

“Peeta.” I say trying to hide the desperation in my voice.

He turns and looks at me, “Yeah?” His perfect blue eyes look so gentle, but still so sad, and lost. I realize no matter how much I want to ask him to stay, and never leave me again. I can’t.