Operation: sound resolution

An interesting debrief

Derek's pov
I sat quietly as the team continued to badger me about the mission until I snapped "Will you all shut the fuck up?! All you do is fucking talk and ask questions to shit you don't want to know! There's no talking to you because you don't listen you just talk so fuck off!" They seemed shocked before it turned to anger as everyone around us seemed to tune into the conversation until Harry appeared "what's going on? Why are you screaming?" Just as I was about to talk Grace yelled "Harry get away from him, he's a terrorist!" He looked me in the eyes before I noticed recognition flash in his eyes before he looked back at her "alright, where's your proof then?" Her sails lost all wind as she deflated "A mask that goes by scorpion knew him, called him an old friend" Harry nodded "is that all? That's all your proof?" She seemed confused as Vicente spoke "he's been yelling at us since we found out" Harry nodded slowly "and this has nothing to do with you all following him around asking questions without letting him answer? You didn't even hear his side of the story before you accused him of being a terrorist, if any of you did, you'd have been told that he was part of a team that disappeared for three weeks, of which he and Efeu were the only survivors." They all seemed horrified as it set in what they'd done, I turned and walked off yelling "fucking disgraceful, the lot of you!" as I heard harry start tearing into them. I walked back to the dorm, caught in my own mind, until Alice found me "hey boss, I heard what happened so our secrets out huh?" I nodded "Scorpion was at the tower, acted like we were still friends and the team came to the conclusion I'm a terrorist so fun times" she chuckled "you okay? You look like me in social gatherings" I nodded slowly still caught in my mind "Just kinda reliving everything, feeling all the pain again, all the loss" she sighed and bumped me with her shoulder "why don't we go get some food and then we can focus on getting through everything?" I stood as she grabbed my hand and pulled me up "come on let's go" I was quiet as we walked through the halls towards the canteen. I subconsciously noticed people whispering to one another as we passed but didn't dwell on it until we got to the table and I saw Monika talking to Grace and Marius and Dominic talking to Gustave and Gilles, I rolled my eyes at the 3, how do you become the top operators of your unit but you can't fucking listen? I sat down after getting my food and was talking with Alice when the three sat down like I was a bomb, clearly nervous and uncomfortable as I looked over bored and with no emotion in my eye "Are you done?" They recoiled "what do you mean?" I replied "acting like I'm a terrorist, I'm not a bomb and I'm not gonna kill you" they sighed "we're sorry, we just don't know what to think" I laughed openly making them confused as Alice asked "what's there to think? Huh? You all could've just asked but no you just assume and make yourselves look like fucking idiots" Monika got annoyed and was going to reply until Marius spoke "alright, then how does he know you two? What happened? Why did he say he misses when you were younger?" I looked up "scorpion, his real name is Colonel Richard Landa, he used to be a KSK officer until he went rogue on a mission. He was my mentor for Bomb disposal, I thought I could trust him with my life. That mission was my 3rd one, I had just started my KSK career when we went on a mission, colonel landa and sergeant pierce killed the other 3 on the mission leaving only Alice and I alive. We couldn't pull the trigger because we thought of them as friends so they captured us and tortured us for 3 weeks trying to get us to betray the unit until they got bored and left us buried in the desert up to our necks where intelligence found us on the satellites" horror dominated their faces as I rolled up my sleeves and Alice lifted the bottom of her shirt showing our bodies dominated by scars as Monika asked "how has this effected your... you um, you mentally?" I replied "in layman's terms, I'm all fucked up" she chuckled despite herself as Alice replied to her question "we both have PTSD, he has insomnia, I have severe anxiety" they looked down as Marius spoke "I'm sorry, we just assumed without asking" I nodded rolling my eyes "for a large number of operators who's entire job is doing quick accurate assessments you guys fucking suck at asking questions like Jesus fucking Christ, Jäger asked a question and 20 seconds later the air was cleared but no everyone at this god forsaken base is a fuckin' pansy who can't ask questions" they shrunk under my harsh words before I fell silent and went back to eating as Alice answered their questions, which now never seemed to end. I stood and wordlessly walked away, heading towards my dorm, just trying to escape the side long glances and murmuring. I picked up my pace as the whispers and murmurs started to grow, gradually turning to screams as I clawed at my head before I reached a secluded section and fell to my knees yelling at the voices "go away! Leave me the fuck alone!" Until I felt a hand on my shoulder causing me to look to my left and see Harry as the screaming evaporated "you seem to be having some trouble" I nodded as he asked "something to do with the mission?" I shrugged "just everyone staring and whispering, acting like I'm a terrorist it's driving me insane" he asked "is that why you're on the ground crying?" I looked down as a tear hit the tile "it just got so overwhelming, I kept hearing all these whispers and then they turned into screams" he nodded slowly "are you okay mentally after this last mission?" I rubbed my arm "yeah, I think I'm okay. It's just overwhelming knowing that scorpion is coming after Alice and I and that everyone thinks we're masks and all the memories are resurfacing, all the scars are itching again" he patted my back "take it easy, you've got a little bit before the next mission. I'll talk to the team and make sure there's no question about your loyalties as well as explain the situation. Don't forget I am a licensed therapist so you can always come to me if you need to talk" I looked over "thank you Harry, really, it means a lot" he smiled as he helped me up "go relax, you've had a long day" I walked off towards the dorm again, trying to stay out of my mind as I moved through the winding labyrinth of halls until I saw the familiar plaque and walked in dropping my vest and helmet on the ground, I pulled off my balaclava and slowly took off my gloves as I sat down on my bed and stared at my freshly cut hands. I pulled out my Bluetooth speaker and connected my phone turning the volume up to max as I started blasting music before I pulled off my shirt as laid back on my bed singing along to the songs I knew. I grabbed a bottle of Old Crow and poured a glass as I stared out the window for a long while before lighting a cigar and singing along to the song in between drinks and puffs, just as I was about to pour another glass I heard the door open, I turned and saw Aria and Alice in the doorway I lifted the glass to them as I downed the last of it before pouring another.

Aria spoke "Where'd you get those? I don't remember having them in here" I replied "the bourbon is mine, the cigar I got from Adriano(Maestro)" she looked shocked at the last part "Adriano doesn't share his Cigars with anyone, why'd he give it to you?" I replied "something about taking me under his wing and having my back no matter what, cool guy he's got some fun stories" she shook her head "you're gonna be pushed in the training he's gonna put you through" I just shrugged as Alice noticed the bottle "Half of it's gone, how long have you been drinking?" I shrugged "45 minutes? Maybe an hour?" She sighed as I took another drink "You need to stop before you're drunk" I looked over "drunk or dead, whichever comes first" Aria asked "what's this all about? Why the sudden alcohol abuse?" I replied "Rubbing alcohol fixes boo boos, alcohol fixes the physical ones" as I took another drink before Alice snatched the glass out of my hand and poured it down the drain. "Hey! That's 22 bucks you're pouring!" As I reached to grab the glass before it was fully dumped, Alice spoke "it's for your own good" I rolled my eyes as Aria grabbed the bottle "And I'm gonna hold onto this so you don't fuck yourself up" I sighed as Adriano appeared next to me "Derek, what's going on here?" I spoke as the buzz appeared "Aria and Alice are throwing out my alcohol because apparently it's bad" he looked at them as Aria spoke "I'm holding onto his alcohol and Alice dumped a glass after he's been drinking for an hour" Adriano sighed "what's bothering you?" I looked up "how'd you like it if everyone suddenly believed you were a terrorist and never asked for your side of the story?" He replied "I'd be pretty pissed" I nodded "I can't kill any of them and I don't feel like breaking their noses so drinking was the answer" he sat down "any reason you're shirtless?" I looked at my scar covered chest "the scars itched, the cold air helped deal with it" he noticed the cigar in the ash tray "already smoking it?" I nodded slowly "I needed something, anything really, to help deal with my mind" Aria spoke "don't sound so down, we all need help sometimes" I looked at my hands as Alice spoke "he'll never believe he deserves it, I've known him for most of my career and he always feels like a burden when he gets help" I flexed my hands as I shook out of my stupor "I'll be fine in a bit, I always am. Death just doesn't want me" Aria replied "maybe you should take the hint" I looked out the window looking at the sunset "maybe, maybe not, who the hell cares?" Alice spoke "I do, I want you alive just as much as you want to die" I rolled my eyes "and what if I'm better off dead?" She spoke "well tough shit, you're not dying" I took another drag on the cigar before putting it out and standing "so Adriano, when are we gonna start training?" He spoke "I was gonna say we'll start today but after this conversation let's start tomorrow alright?" I nodded "what time?" He replied "how's 0600?" I replied "sounds good, I'll see ya then alright?" He stood and spoke "Yeah, see you tomorrow morning. Goodnight everyone" as we said goodnight and everyone went their separate ways. Aria went to her bed as I walked into the bathroom to shower, I looked around seeing that I was alone until I noticed the man staring at me, it's obvious he wanted to kill me before I shrugged and looked away from the mirror and climbed into the shower.