Our Script

Chapter 16

Illiana's P.O.V

My mom, dad and brother decided to drop me off at the psychiatrist and they all decided to wait for me.

I walked into the office. It was white with beautiful art on the wall. There was also a nice view of the garden out side. It was a Japanese themed garden which is my favorite cause the simplicity, it was just beautiful.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Gordon" she introduced herself.

"'Hi I'm Illiana. Can we go sit in the garden?" I asked.

"Of course we can, if that would make you more comfortable." She responded

We went outside and sat in the garden on the grass.

"What's your plan for the future?" She asked.

"Well I might  study law or perhaps medicine mom, dad and I haven't really decided yet but as long as my marks stay up I can do any." I said.

"What do you want to do?" She asked.

"Didn't I just answer that question?" I asked

"You said you might study law or medicine, If any of those were part of your dream or vision you'd know for a fact which one you'd want to study." She told me.

"I don't really know what I want to study but the one thing I'm going to have is my own charity. For people who can't receive the appropriate medical care and maybe expand into helping people who are poverty stricken." I said.

"Why would you choose medical care?" She asked.

"My cousin was autistic and her immediate family didn't have the means to pay for her medical treatments. . . There also wasn't a school anywhere near them that dealt with children with mental health problems nor did they look at any other possible physical issues" I said

"Your cousin was?" She asked.

"Yeah my cousin passed away due to a heart defect" I said.

"And how did that effect your life?" She asked.

"Well I'm just alone now, nothing that dramatic. It's kinda like what I call the hourglass effect. . . Well one side of the hour class is filling up the other is wasting away, the world keeps going even if you're not ready." I explained.

"But you're not necessarily alone, your parents and brother are still around." She said.

"No not really they're here now. Normally they're traveling cause of business. . . Once they assume I'm fine they'll be gone." I said feeling a knot in my throat.

"Why don't you travel with them?" She asked.

"Because this is home. On lucky days I can smell rosemary" I responded.

"Why is the smell of rosemary so important to you?" She asked.

"Well a few weeks after my cousin funeral my granny passed away, they  assume she couldn't deal with the heart ache. I think her soul couldn't deal with not having Maria with her." I explained.

"That must have been hard to deal with" she stated.

"It was, losing the two people that were consistent in my life was earth shattering but life went on." I said.

"But that doesn't lessen the pain" she said.

"You have to deal with the pain, you have no other choice." I responded.

"How did you deal with it?" She asked.

"I placed all my energy bad and good in school work and extra curricular activities" I responded.

"What has been happening lately that upset you?" She asked.

"I'm okay. . . It's just I'm used to having control of everything, what I eat, what time I wake up, if I go to school or not but lately it seems like I don't have any control." I said.

"What makes you think that you lost control?" She asked.

"There's this guy . . . his name is irrelevant. . . But ever since I met him my life has been shitty. At first he hated me for no reason, his girlfriend attacked me, my ex boyfriend raged out on me and hurt my jaw. After all that we became friends cause he apologized then we hung out for three whole weeks then he ghosted me yesterday. . . Just like that! No explanation of any kind" I complained.

"Okay. . . So you blame him for all of this." She asked.

"Yes I do, if he took a chance to get to me from the beginning then he wouldn't have had a problem, with me, Shay wouldn't have thrown him with wine and his girlfriend would have thrown me with coke and my ex wouldn't have been angry cause of the altercation we had. This was all a fucked up chain reaction caused by his ego." I said

"But you're upset cause he. . .ghosted you, if he was really that bad him ghosting you wouldn't have been a bad thing" she said.

"I never said he was bad guy. . . I think the universe doesn't want us together" I said.

"So you want to be with him" she asked.

"YES.... I mean no. . . Not in a romantic way" I said

She smiled

"As far as I'm aware you're just going through a difficult stage in life on you haven't learned how to cope. So I'm going to put you on a very mild antidepressants and suggest you join a support group for teenagers going through the same thing." She said handing me a pamphlet.

We went home and I went straight to bed I was physically and emotionally exhausted. When I woke up it was 15:30 p.m, I took a shower and got ready to go to the Stone's. I felt anxious but decided to go anyway.

When I got there Stephen seemed to be on his way out. He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something but no words left his mouth instead he shook his head, jumped in his car and spead off.

I was genuinely hurt he didn't care to find out what was wrong. . . He didn't even bother to make small talk. I knew I shouldn't have come, I knew he was most likely going to act this way, but that didn't lessen the pain.

I walked into the stone house and shook of all the thoughts that were running through my head. I hated this feeling. All I wanted to do was cry. But right now I was here for for Jennifer and I should not let her asshole of a brother take away from her learning how to play.

"I learned. . . I learned a, new-new song. . . For you" she said.

This was the very first time Jen played. Her tic was gone she played a very sad tempo but she played it perfectly. I didn't know if I should clap or sob, I was just so proud. Mrs. Stone walked in while she was playing and was mesmerized by her daughter playing the piano. After Jen was done playing her mother turned to me sobbing.

"Thank you! Thank you so much" she said me tightly.

"No need to thank me this was your daughter's masked talent shining through. I didn't even teach her this tempo" I said.

"So many people said she couldn't and with you're help she did! I wish I could repay you but there is no amount of money. . . Thank you Illiana. I lost hope for a second and this. . ." She said then went back to sobbing but instead of happy crying she seemed to be heart broken.

I hugged her.

1 month flew past. The routine stayed the same but the difference is I had my family with me. I didn't speak to Stephen, when I went to his house he was either leaving or gone, I got use to his distance and I encourage it.