Together As One

My New Forbidden Secret

[Hwasa's POV]

I opened my eyes and immediately groaned. Wheein was standing in front of me pressing on a noisy rubber toy chicken which was squawking loudly into my face early in the morning.

Then I remembered, oh yeah, the members slept over last night.

/Flashback to the day before/

I hurried home away from RBW agency. I knew the other members were likely to be confused as to why I turned down the meal together but I had my reasons. I knew I won't be able to control myself well if I ate with the members but right now, I needed to diet even more strictly. I reached home and dumped my clothes into the wash and opened the fridge to take a bottle of ice-cold water. My plan was to skip dinner tonight and I couldn't let anyone stop me. This diet had to have some impact on my image if not the haters would just come attacking me even more and more. As I sat down in my room, I felt a tiny sting in my stomach. Ah, must be gastric from skipping breakfast and only having a cup of coffee for lunch. I winced a little as I got up to get some medicine for the pain.

Ring... Ring... I heard my doorbell being rung nonstop for at least 5 times. Then the all too familiar chorus of voices.

Ah... what were the members doing here? Weren't they supposed to go and grab dinner together after I left? I wonder to myself and dragged my feet to open the door. For a split second, I forgot that I had left my laptop screen on, brightly showing the page that I was on - a news article about the hatred the public had towards me.

I let the members in and hurried back to my room to off the screen and close the door tightly. The last thing I needed right now was to make the members worried, and I knew they would be if they knew I was looking at such things again, but I couldn't stop myself from drowning in the negativity. It sucked my whole soul in and it seemed like there was no light in that cave.

I stuffed a piece of gopchang into my mouth unwillingly. My plan to skip dinner failed, I had to find a way to get the food out of my body without the rest noticing. I chew slowly trying to look as though I was eating constantly. I stared at the many bowls of takeout on the table. Too much temptation.

You're fat. You need to lose weight. If you eat, you will become uglier. Stop ruining Mamamoo.

The comments rang in my head and I spaced out for a second while staring blankly at the rice cake bowl on the table.

"Earth to Ahn Hyejin. A penny for your thoughts?" I was called back to the situation before me as Wheein poked me with the clean end of her chopsticks.

Ah... I had to cook up a reason that was believable.

"I just checked my memory bank and realized I forgot the dance moves already." I quickly use as an excuse and excused myself to the toilet.

I closed the toilet door and locked it.

I had to throw up. I needed to puke out all the food I eat at dinner. I bent down and faced the toilet bowl and scratched my throat.

Just as I stood up to wash my hands and face, I hear a knock on the door. Oh, Wheein was asking if I was okay. I dried my hands and opened the door and smiled at her calmly before bringing her back to the unnies.

Phew... I mentally sighed. Good thing I locked the door. Now I needed to go online and buy some diet pills to speed up the diet process. It wasn't the most healthy way but I was at my wit's end.

After finally having privacy in my room, I turned on my laptop again and started to work on my task at hand. As I was scrolling through the comments on another of our videos, suddenly I got a shock as Wheein popped out of nowhere. I slammed my laptop shut and placed it on my desk. I collected my thoughts before turning to face Wheein who was already spreading her limbs on my bed.