S H E

To the one named she.

I want to text a guy
That I don't know
That I find mildly attractive
Or not attractive at all
And have a conversation with them
For more than thirty minutes
Without them asking me for pictures
Of parts of my body
For their own pleasures
And those of their friends
And their neighbors
And their brothers
Simply because its common courtesy to share
The privacy of a woman
Who trusted you enough
To let you see that side of her

I'm so used to the trend now
How predictable you all are
"Hey"
"Hey"
"What's your name?"
"Send me your pictures"
"I'm so horny for you baby"
"Do you mind if you send some of you with less clothes on?
"What color is your bra?"
"What colour is your underwear"
"Do you even have any on?
"Can you take them off?"
"Can you send me a picture"
"Do you trust me?"

Trust you?
How dare you ask me that
Right after you've
Robbed me all the confidence in my body
I feel like such a slut
I feel so easy
And ready to spread my legs for all to see
You call me that
And tell me to trust you with my sanity
When I already have doubt's planted in my head
Wondering if I'll seem boring or weird not to comply.

I want to breathe
For a second
Without worrying
How I'm seen
In front of society
A good girl or a bad girl
Yet either way
The hungry gazes
That follow after my path
Don't make me feel powerful
Only powerless
Even though I can't speak out loud
How I feel to the world
Every time I'm called a prude
Simply because my morals and principles
Forbid me to send you pictures
Of me naked
As I lay on my bed
Or stand before my mirror
Its not an obligation!
For me to sit here and look pretty
So you could beat your shaft black and blue
Till you reach completion
And leave me here feeling
Like the skin on my body is not mine
Wanting to rip it off
For I know I shouldn't have sent that picture
I shouldn't feel like scrubbing my skin raw
Why do I feel like I was raped
Or molested
Maybe I was raped,
Right?
I mean it feels that way inside
The pressure
The force
The burden
So maybe you shouldn't wonder
Why I stopped using social media
Why I deleted all my accounts
Why I feel skittish and afraid
When you know what you did to me
And her
And every other woman in this godforsaken world
Raised to believe that they live only for a man's pleasure
That they can never be more
That they can never be whole
Without men
I'm no feminist
But If women categorize as human
Its high time they got treated like one too.