High Walls// LS

Chapter 4- Harry

Chapter 4:

I wake up to my buzzing alarm and for the first time all year I don't press snooze. I feel good today. After the hanging out with the boys yesterday, I arrived home to see most of my family in Gemma's living room. They didn't know if I would need cheering up or help celebrating, but as I made eye contact with them I couldn't help but smile after the day I had.

I couldn't hate Louis. I tried, but he had been my best friend. I didn't see why we couldn't try that again. It would make everything easier, and it would make me happier. 

I smile at the thought of how happy my sister was when I told her I would be joining the boys again. 

My phone buzzes again, catching my attention. 

Liam Payne- Did you see Louis's post yet, mate?

What? Did I miss something?

Me- Uh no? What is it on?

Within a couple of seconds I get another reply telling me to check Instagram. I click on the app and scroll down a few posts until I see Louis face on my screen.

I feel a smile form on my face as I start to listen to him talk. It's so sweet that he always tries to involve his fans on social media, always making videos for them on his own time. It doesn't take me long to notice how tense he is though, and that something must be wrong. 

As I start paying attention to his words more, I get an idea of what he is freaking out over. 

It couldn't be. He wouldn't make this video now, would he?

"I'm bisexual" Louis says into the camera.

I sit up in bed, pausing the video and looking down at my phone with wide eyes. Excuse me, what did he just say?

Before I can start the video again my door opens and my sister stands at the entrance to my room, phone in her hand. 

She starts talking, but honestly, I don't catch a word that comes out of her mouth. I know that this isn't possible. He has been bi for nine years, and he would never talk about it. This couldn't possibly be the same boy who heavily denied rumors of us right in front of me for all those years. He was way too scared to do something like this.

"Harry, are you even listening to me right now?" Gemma ask, sitting on my bed and shaking my shoulder roughly.

I look back at her, shock still evident on my face. "Did you see this?" I ask shoving my phone in her hands. 

She laughs and throws her arms around me, "He finally came out Harry, he did it."

He did it. Louis came out to the world.

I wasn't dreaming, this was real. 

Why did he finally do it? I realize quickly that it's not because of me. If it would have been about me, this would have happened a long time ago. I think about the possibility that there is someone new in his life and my heart immediately drops. I couldn't take this again; seeing him with Eleanor last year had crushed me. I knew that they were close, but seeing them be in a relationship was hard. When I saw the headlines that they were over, and this time apparently for good, I was so relieved. Even if I can't have him, I didn't want her to have him either. 

It's not that I didn't like Eleanor, I actually liked her a lot. She was patient and understanding with Louis and I, and played a really good cover girlfriend while we were in the band. She didn't mind helping us out, but I always knew she secretly had feelings for Louis. I wasn't that surprised when they got together soon after his baby was born. 

But I didn't like it; Louis was mine. I didn't want him with anyone else, even if it was someone who I liked. 

I had had quite a few partners after Louis, but each of them were short and the relationships were shallow. They just didn't come close to making me feel the same sparks and passion that the blue eyed boy had always ignited in me.

Gemma hits my shoulder again, making me wince. "Harry, stop zoning out and listen to me. This is a good thing, right? Maybe this means he's finally ready for a public relationship with you."

I shoot her a look that makes the smile wipe off her face, "If this was for me Gemma, it wouldn't have taken him this long. There must be someone else."

"You can't be serious? You're such a bloody idiot sometimes Harry. I don't know how we are related." She gets up off the bed and starts to leave my room before turning around and saying, "He loves you, just as much as you love him. Anyone with eyes can see that, except you apparently."

I sigh and watch her exit my room before turning my attention back to the Instagram post. I watch his video through one more time and decide to comment on it. Thinking about what to say, I decide to go with "I'm proud of you, takes a lot of courage. :)"

After posting that, I scroll through his comments and see that a majority of them are extremely supportive. My eyes land on one that brings a smile to my face. 

Harryloveslemons: YES LOUIS. This is what we've been waiting for for so long. We love you no matter what. Now go be happy with Harry, it will make us happy too.

I shake my head in amusement as I think about all our "Larry" shippers. They are going to die once they see this post, I can already imagine all the videos and edits we will be flooded with the next few days. 

They have always been able to see through the bullshit management would make us feed to the media. The first time I saw a post about it, my heart dropped so fast. I remember being so scared because at the time we hadn't even come to terms with our feelings. I still thought that it would be impossible for someone as amazing and attractive as Louis to even think about me that way. It wasn't though, our love was so good. We truly had such a connection, one that I will always be thankful for. That was what made it so hard finding another person, though. None of them got me like Louis got me. I get another notification on my phone, and zone back into reality.

Louist91: thanks Hazza :) @harrystyles

Hazza, he hadn't called me that in almost 5 years. I smile and think of all the memories behind that nickname. 

This might be a fun year after all. 

Niall Horan- Hey mate, we are all coming to pick you up to go grab something to eat. Be ready in 15 minutes. 

I smile as I see this text appear on my screen, Niall was so excited for us to reunite. I could easily tell that he was the happiest one at the table yesterday.

It was also interesting to see Zayn there and hear his apology to all of us. He had told us how sorry he was for everything, for all of the interviews and for leaving so abruptly. I had always known he didn't mean harm by any of it, I think it was time for all of us to have a break at that point. I had always felt bad for the amount of hate he had received for his decision, since I knew he was only doing what he thought was best for him at the time. 

I missed him a lot, I missed all of them a lot. They were my favorite people at one point, and it definitely felt good to be around them again. 

Deciding that I was actually pretty starving, I text Niall back an "Okay!" and hop out of bed to get ready.

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Thank you guys for reading this far! I really appreciate you giving this book a chance.

-Cassidy