Farewell...

Smiles, beauty and calm...

"It does not matter what you thought, you did an amazing job." He said and held my hand. "What- what are you doing now?" I asked, taken aback. "We are going to a place where we can get our minds off this 'goodbye situation', okay?" he said and practically dragged me there.

A restaurant called, Maison des affame's ~home of the hungry, in French.

"Why bring me here? Such a fancy establishment and I'm a mess.." I said, almost embarrassed of myself. I was anxious and I couldn't hide it, at all. "You're perfect. Don't worry and I love this restaurant." He replied and smiled.

I was confused as to why he was smiling. Why was he so happy? What about Zeke's being gone made him happy? How did it comfort him?

"Why do you seem so happy?" I asked him. "Well because, Zeke will never again have to suffer or bear the torture man-kind created. He is in a pain free world... where pain does not exist" he said, clearly unafraid of whatever nonsensical rubbish he had just uttered. "So you're probably one of those people who believe that everything happens as part of one big plan... are you not?" I asked, interested. "Yeah, I guess I am and you're not?" He asked me.

"I am not. Well I stopped thinking that way when I was sixteen so...yep" I said, trying to avoid eye contact. This normally happened when I wanted to say something or was interested in something but felt nervous for some reason. "well, that's that." He said and smiled. "Wow..." I said and smiled slightly. I was smiling at the irony in life.

He stared at me for a second and smiled even more. "What?" I asked him. "Is that what it looks like?" He asked, not being direct, at all. "What are you saying person?" I asked, scoffing. "uhm.. your smile?" He asked with a fading smiling. "I don't usually tell people so much about me upon the first meeting." I said, awkwardly. I was confusing to be honest. "No, what are you saying person?" He asked, laughing. It was nice to hear someone laugh, even in this period of time.

The waitress then brought our requested meals, as per Marcel's request since I was not used to such elegant sceneries and there it was our soupe de butternut et pain grille

That was butternut soup I guess. "Why soup?" I asked him. "Did anyone ever tell you, you talk too much?" He asked, sarcastically. "Yes, actually and I choose to not care." I replied, annoyed as hell. I then thought of my empty home, the words that chose to stay with me. "To warm up and butternut cause its sweet and you could really use a sweetner... well, do you? Do you not care?" He said and smiled. He was all too curious. "No, I try not to." I said, a little stuck in thought. "Hey, do you believe in destiny?" He asked, all so randomly. "No, if I must be honest." I said, having my soup.

I took a long stare at his face, I searched it for sincerity and maybe he was sincere but I didn't want to believe he was, thus because of the blood that follows in his veins. It was dishonest. His blood. It could easily fool you, make you believe in a 'perfect love' and no such thing existed, as much as we all want to believe in it... it's a lie.

"Can we please leave?" I asked, exhausted. "Well, I won't argue." He said and smiled.

In almost no time, we were out of there and on our way to my apartment. It was a windy afternoon and I felt calm, all because of this. I couldn't stop smiling as the wind blew stronger and stronger. "Thank goodness, an honest smile." He said, smiling at me. Although I was annoyed by him, I liked him regardless of my annoyance. He was a good person so far and one can't judge one's character based on the actions of another. "Thank goodness..." I said, laughing at how hectic my day had been. I wanted to feel free, like everything was okay. It wasn't okay and it sucked.

"Are you okay?" he asked me as we approached the apartment building. I stopped for a moment. It had been a while since someone last asked me that. "I guess I'm alright but I could be better." I said in all honesty. "What would make it better?" He asked, smiling. "If Zeke was still here, able to make fun of me, able to make me feel like life is easier the way it is... and with him life was simplier and a lot more easier." I stated and sighed.

"I'll let you in on a little secret, life was never easier when he was around. You're just trying to make yourself believe it was because you're in pain...you miss him and I think he would want you to believe that you're in charge of your own destiny, your happiness." He said and slid his hands into his pants.

I didn't quite know how to respond. It was beautiful, what he said. "Okay, I guess I should get going..." I said, awkward and stuck in thought. "Yeah, I guess. Bye, Tiffany." He said, awkwardly staring at me. "Or, would you like to have a drink with me? I don't know but I don't want you to go yet..." I said, stammering, hopeless little me. "Are you sure? You seemed a bit irritated by my presence..." He said, making me regret all the words that had just left my mouth. I looked at him and sighed. "You know what, bye!" I said, saddened and embarrassed I would ask a stranger such. No matter how normal all this felt, he was still a stranger. And I walked away from him.

I didn't want anyone's pity and I'm glad he didn't give me any.

He let me be rude, irritated and he allowed me to be confused with myself for a while and I needed that.

He didn't follow me but walked away. I admired the wind, the air, the forever changing moment, the only time I felt like the world revolved around me.