" now i have neither happiness nor unhappiness. everything passes.
that is the one and only thing that i have thought resembled a truth in the society of human beings where i have dwelled up to now as in a burning hell.
everything passes. "
- daz...
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it all happened so fast.
"you just don't understand! you don't understand a single bit!" he screamed.
he would never harshly scold at you like that, you could only wonder what caused him to be like this.
what once were gorgeous vases and glass cabinets was now transformed to sharp little shards. small and big picture frames falling apart from the concrete walls.
and you? just bruised and still bleeding on the floor.
"why did i ever end up with you?" that's what he told you before going to sleep comfortably. in the other hand, you were in the bathroom, hurriedly treating your purple bruises and cleaning up everything.
this nightmare happened regularly. you could say that it felt like extreme torture, just like a silencer pointed at your forehead. why a silencer you asked?
because everything should be done quietly, without anyone knowing. with every violent act, there must be silence. if there's a witness, they will be silenced. if you create noise, you will be silenced. it's just how his system works, his wicked mindset.
as if his brain was a machine operating every time, creating ideas how to hurt you physically and mentally. everything felt odd for you because he wanted to break you, because at this moment, in his eyes, you are nothing but powerless. no one noticed a single thing because all your purple bruises were covered with turtlenecks, long sleeves, jeans, jackets, and bandages.
he changed. he definitely changed because you don't even recognize him anymore. this was not the chuuya you knew. this was not the person who asked you on a fancy date, promising to never hurt you even once. this isn't the man you love.
but what happened?
you silently cried yourself to sleep, just like you always did for the straight seven months.
NEXT DAY
"[y/n]!" dazai yelled from a distance, trying to catch your attention. "yeah?"
he asked you where chuuya was, concerned. "he's at home. he'll be here soon." you say, no life added to your tone.
dazai, despite being goofy to you all the time, he noticed a bruise on your neck that you've forgotten to cover. he said nothing but he pointed at it.
your eyes widened when he was about to speak. you cover his mouth and wrote in a piece of paper.
' i have a chip inside my arm. it is a recording kind of device that chuuya placed inside me while i was asleep, so he could hear me while i'm not in his sight.'
you gave the note to dazai, while you pointed at the area where the chip was.
dazai's intelligence has it that he could tell that you were being abused. there were no other words or phrases for it.