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05💜

It's been a little more than two weeks since the confession that broke his heart, since what Hoseok bitterly calls The Worst Day of His Life™. At this point in time the members are starting to worry about his well being. Other than to sleep a few fitful hours late at night, Hoseok has holed himself in the practice room, eating little and speaking even less. Occasionally, he would get stressed out and follow a similar pattern, but it was always when a comeback was nearing. Their comeback had come and gone in the span of time since Hoseok began acting weird, however. They even had been to several interviews and on trips into the city they were currently visiting - two things that always raised the spirits of the members. Usually his unhealthy behavior would subside within a few days,but it seemed as if the funk he had dug himself into wasn't going away as quickly as it usually did.

The others had tried to reach out to their member as well, but they were continuously brushed off with an "I'm fine," or "I'm just tired." Hoseok knew he couldn't keep himself from suspicion much longer, not when his band mates had been around him for years, had learned his mannerisms and knew that something was seriously wrong. He vowed to himself he'd feel better after their concert- the first one since comeback. A concert which was now less than 24 hours away. But this was good, since routine always helped the dancer feel better, more stable, more in control.

Yeah, he'd feel much better afterwards.

Flying.

Hoseok felt like he was flying as his feet glided him along the stage, his heart full and his spirit in the clouds. His smile was blinding as he executed the choreography perfectly, the crowd roaring with excitement while his solo song Just Dance played over the loudspeakers. The dancer paused in his choreography momentarily to walk back to the main stage, and as he pulled his earpiece out to listen to the chanting of his stage-name his eyes began to grow wet. He'd put in so much work in his life to be able to experience moments like these.

Being on stage made him endlessly nervous, but Hoseok loved nothing more than a challenge.Well, he did love somethings more than a challenge. Things like girl group dances, or Mickey, or Taehyung. Speaking of the younger band member, he had stopped the older man before Hoseok went on for his solo stage, large hand wrapped around Hoseok's wrist as he tugged him into as mothering hug. It was too much for Hoseok. Though he didn't have time to hug back before the younger was walking away, the dancer felt all the walls he had built up within the past week scrumble as a mixture of warmth and darkness swirled in his chest.

Hoseok jumped back into the choreography, the bright feeling he harbored dulling slightly as Taehyung crossed his mind.

This is nice. His mind supplied, Too bad it won't last for long.

The man faltered slightly as he danced, however, he was able to recover and make it seem as if it was part of the choreography. Fresh sweat broke out onto his forehead as his thoughts began to cloud. The melody of cheers in the stadium became just flooding noise around him.

Hold on to this feeling, Hoseok. Said man gasped and his eyes rounded in fear as he took a misstep,slipped, and fell unexpectedly on his side.

He doesn't love you.

The crowd erupted into frightened yells. He felt like he was drowning.

No one does.

He fought to stand back up and brush himself off with a smile and a laugh, letting the crowd know he was okay as he finished the last bit of choreography.

If they knew who you really were, what you really felt, you'd be forgotten - hated within moments.

His walk back to the elevator part of the stage was rushed and bouncy as he waved goodbye, the last notes of his solo song filtering through the air.

He would hate you.

His smile grew ever stronger once he was below the stage, crew rushing towards him to change his outfit and check to make sure the dancer was okay from his fall.

You'll end up alone.

Taehyung watched from a distance, not buying the bright energy Hoseok was giving off. The blue haired male followed as everyone walked along the corridor to the full dressing area. After changing, the younger immediately inched closer and grasped Hoseok's hand in his own. The brunette was trembling slightly. The elder looked up, frightened, and his façade dropped - if only for a moment - once his eyes met Taehyung's. The vocalist's smile was soft, but the look was quickly changed into one of surprise and hurt as Hoseok yanked his hand out of the other's - as if having touched fire. The rapper looked away as he clutched his own hand to his chest.

You'll never be enough.

***

[Fifth chapter done!]