Through My Eyes

Chapter Five

“Good evening.” I say, lowering myself into my seat.

I sense Emmanuel's eyes upon me, but do not dare to return his gaze. Mary dashes into the kitchen, her dress flowing behind her. I don't blame her. If I were in her shoes, I would not stay here for another day. 

“Good evening.” Lady Elizabeth smiles warmly at me. Mother was right; Emmanuel has not told his mother about the unfolded events. I look at Mother, who just glares at me before asking Emmanuel if he enjoyed riding Lightning in the morning.

“Oh, yes.” Emmanuel replies fervently, “Lightning is a wondrous stallion. Such speed and stamina. Who did Lightning belong to?”

“Lightning belonged to Eloise' late father and me.” Mother gazes at her now-full plate, seemingly sorrow-struck. On the other hand, I know this is a pretence. When Father passed away, Mother was overjoyed – she had hated him since the day it was revealed he had an illegitimate child. 

That illegitimate child was Peter. Though he's my step-brother, Mother treats him with the same coldness she treats Mary and the butler with. We never did find out who Peter's mother was. 

“Eloise, dear, are you feeling alright?” Lady Elizabeth breaks me from my reverie, “You seem rather pale and you have not touched your food yet.”

I attempt to smile, “I am well, thank you for asking. I was just wondering if the horses had been fed yet.”

“Do you want me to enquire with Peter, Miss Eloise?” Mary asks, her hands clasped in front of her.

“No, Mary, that will be quite alright. Peter is a responsible boy, I am certain he has fed them. I just enjoy worrying about tedious issues.”

Lady Elizabeth lets out a brief, shrill laugh, “Now that it has been cleared up, do taste the lovely food, Eloise dear.”

“Yes, Mrs Colleton.” I take nimble spoonfuls of the soup, swilling it around in my mouth thoughtfully before swallowing and feeling the hot liquid streaming down my oesophagus. 

Once my plate is empty, I glance at Mother, who clasps her hands and straightens her back, pushing her shoulders back and saying, “Why, it is the most beautiful evening. Emmanuel, why do you and Eloise not go for a stroll? It will be most enchanting outside tonight.”

“Of course, if your daughter does not mind, I would love to go for a stroll.”

“No, no, of course she does not mind!” 

I gawk at Mother in disbelief (how could she make such a decision for me?!) before composing myself and rising to my feet, “It is a fine opportunity to enjoy a British summer evening.”

I link my arm through Emmanuel's and we stride to the gardens, moving smoothly and silently. 

“Eloise...” Emmanuel begins.

“Emmanuel.” I interrupt, “I wish to apologise for my... unruly behaviour so far. You do not understand my ways as of yet, you do not comprehend my words as people close to me comprehend them, you clash with my mannerisms in every way possible. Yet, I wish to give you a chance. My mother is disappointed in me, which is nothing but a daily occurrence.”

Emmanuel seems confounded by this.

“Last night was a darker side of me, if you will. I do not hesitate in recklessly protecting people who are close to me, which sometimes means that people misunderstand me and my personality.” I look at my clasped hands, “We are to be engaged next week. I wish to know you in this week, I want to know who you really are. I wish to know the person I will spend my life with.”