Coloured Me Grey (Book Two)

Chapter 17

"In the Mauryan Empire, the Buddhist scriptures and artworks were patronized by -"

"Ashoka." Duh. "After seeing the destructions of the Kalinga War, he became Dhammashoka the Righteous from Chandashoka the Fierce." I liked reading about this king. But the fact that gave me a racing heart early in the morning was Maity Sir insisting to ask me mock questions before the others arrived. "Oh, he adopted Buddhism and non-violence, I think patronized religious scholarship."

"Okay, last question. You are fidgeting already." He chuckled. No I wasn't, at the back of my mind I was just wondering when Yash would arrive. "Where is the largest statue of Bahubali located?"

I giggled at the name. The hunk from the South Indian movie? Of course not. "Shravanabelagola, Karnataka. He was one of the first Jain Digamvaras to attain Moksha. The statue is also called Gomateshwara."

"That's it then," he threw the book down on his table. His sudden outbursts of rough behavior like this made me shudder at times but one semester of his classes and I knew I had nothing to fear. "We'll revise again tomorrow." The door clicked open and we both looked up at it. "Oh, look. Your friend is here!" he said with mock enthusiasm.

I can't believe our good old professor is jealous that I finally have a friend.

Yash was glaring at the back of the professor's head and then threw another lethal one in my direction. He sauntered to his usual seat at the back of the classroom. I shifted uncomfortably in my bench.

What am I supposed to do now? I've never seen people move around in the class once the teacher is in the room. 

I kept looking back at where Yash was now disappearing behind an Indian art history book.

"Trouble in paradise?"

I swear this teacher had the most embarrassing dad vibes ever.

"Can I uh ...?" I expected him to know what I would ask for if he was going to be so interested in my social life.

"Sure, go on," he said, pulling out a bunch of homework sheets from his bag. "Your class hasn't started yet."

I slid out of the bench and made my way towards Yash.

"I'm sorry -" I began in a low voice.

"Don't create a scene in here." Yash's voice was small but sharp.

"I don't want to." I gulped. It was hitting me for real. Holy shit, he was furious. "I'm really sorry for yesterday. You were right, I wasn't being myself."

He moved further into the bench and I wondered if that was because he wanted me to sit beside him or to stay away from me.

Just sit down. Make him understand. You are the one apologizing, so initiate an apologetic explanation for gods' sake. You owe him that.

"I didn't mean all that I said yesterday." I had sat down beside him and was glad he was looking at me directly. "I was in a bad mood, and I'm really sorry for taking it out on you. You were only trying to help me, I know that."

"You must have meant some of it. What if you are going to lash out like that everytime you are in a bad mood?"

I didn't know how to answer that so I looked down at my hands. But I promptly hid them away from sight. Just in case. I had never dealt with people when I was upset - it has always come out in a twisted manner. What if this was the way I was meant to be? What if I could not really cahnge myself?

"I don't know," I blurted out, picking at my chapped lips.

"I figured so. Now leave me alone. I don't want to deal with people who cannot leave their baggage where it belongs."