notadiary

4. Commissions and art

For the longest time, I've have wanted to sell art-prints or/ and do commissions. But I feel like you have to reach a certain point in you're art-journey to do that.

The thing is, I really do not know what that point is, what it looks like, where it is and when you have reached it.

It's like, in my head, that point is only for me. I know that sounds weird or whatever, but.. when I look at any other artist, I feel like they are amazing and that they could charge huge amounts of money for their art and that "point" does not exist, or maybe they've reached it?

I know that us humans judge our selves all the time, we compare and underestimate. But how do you overcome all that self-made negativity? Those awful opinions of your self.

My parents have told me multiple times:

Would you say to somebody else, what you say to you're self? Because if not, you shouldn't be saying it to you're self.

I love that! But it's so hard😔
It's hard breaking the pattern of ugly comments and a harsh critic. And the worst part is that it's all in you're head, no one could tell you to stop being mean, cause no one except you hears it.

Oof that turned deep pretty fast, deeper than deep actually 😂🥴
I'm sorry😳😆
I hope that if you deal with that kind of taught's that this could help.😅 I'm working a lot with my thoughts, it takes time, but it helps.

You can't be happy if there's constantly someone saying that you're not good enough, even if it's your self, especially if it's yourself! So do what you gotta do to think happy thoughts😁❤

And again, sorry for that dark deep thing😂
Also! I'm ok. I'm actually great😎 (A lot because I've been working so much with this) but I guess I just needed to let it out as part of that "self-acceptance journey" which I, by the way, think never really ends🥴🥴😅

Anyways, art, prints commissions. I think I have got to think a bit more +I'm a bit scared, (more like a lot) that I'll be like "Hey! Commissions are open!!" or like "Got some prints!" and then no one is interested, so my mom's like! "Hunny, I'd like to by a drawing of you❤" even though she knows that she doesn't at all need to pay me for my art, but she does so I don't get upset or something, and you know the rest!

I feel like my mind just threw up🤮🤯🤣

So as you see, I overthink too much😂 Another thing is that I don't have a ton of followers like don't misunderstand, I'm incredible, incredibly, incredible, incredibly thankful for those I have.❤

Like, I think I get too excited whenever I get a new follower of someone comments something nice or likes my post. And about that comment part, I really get SO, SO, SO happy, and I'm SO bad at responding so I feel like I comment the same thing to everyone, and I'm scared of not commenting the right thing. Am I grateful enough, am I too grateful...

But back to the point (again😂🙈)
I do not think that I've reached enough people to get anywhere with my art yet sooooo, yeh. Think I'll wait a bit longer😅

I guess I'm just scared to be embarrassed or something 🙈🥴🥴😂😅

Well, that was a lot! I'll end it with some meme's just to lighten the mood😂😆

Well, I'm sure you've seen all of them before, but who cares😂