Today has been weird.
I'm just a wreck, I've just cryed so much today over literally nothing.
I was driving with my dad and I drowe for longer than I have done before and when I came home and sat down I just started crying. Not hysterically, but I was crying. I was just so drained for energy that my body didn't handle anything and yeah.. anyways, I hugged both my parents and picked myself up afain and moved on, but I was still really tired.
Later I was going to wach Flash with my brother, and we had a tiny discussion about the volume, stupid.. I know. Well here's something more stupid, I said to him that I was getting really stressed, and I started hitting a pillow and cept telling him I was really stressed and couldnt handle this anymore. He taught I was kidding and starte laughing, like I understand him, I said that it felt like an anxiety attack was coming, and he still didn't belive me, I were kinde hysterically laughing with a shivering voice, and then sudently I just started crying like a moron. He looked at me and said "oh, shit! You weren't joking!" And I was like "nooo" while sobing. Then he hugged me.
So there I was hysterically crying in my 3 years younger brother's arms. Oof, what a mess. My mom came in and was like, "what is it?" and my brother explained everything while nervously laughing, and then ended the sentence with "Do we have any iron?" probably thinking that I had a lack of iron or something.
OMG! I have the best brother in the world. I felt so pathetic, but I've NEVER felt any kind of safety while having an anxiety attack before, so he definitely was a help.
I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!😭😭❤❤
I DON'T DESERVE HIM😭😭❤❤
I'M SUCH A MESS😭😭
❤❤
I did have another break down later tonight, but it's nothing more to talk about, I'm just really weak both emotionally and physically, and thats not a great combo + not meting people and being inside A LOT.. not good🥴
Anyways, I'm just going through it these days, so I'm really sory for so negative and depressing content, but it just really helpes me writing, and letting it out wven though I talk a lot too.
Good night🥴❤
YOU ARE READING
notadiary
RandomHi! This is not a diary. It's just a place where I empty my brain, and write stupid stuff and... yeah, it's definitely a diary or something like that, I do no.. enjoy!😅😎 (You really don't have to read this, but if you do.. thanks!😅)
