𝐠𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐞 ||𝐤𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧||

6

the sky, at this point in time, looked like a painted canvas, i would have never thought that colours as vibrant as these could ever appear naturally. oh, how i wish that the sky would take my attention away now, unfortunately...

i almost feel like a creep, browsing social media accounts and posts which had posted anything about about the cafe kenma and i visited. he never told me his instagram or anything, so i assumed he did not use them, but i saw the apps on his phone.

i feel weird going behind his back, maybe even a bit guilty - what if i uncover something i am not ready for? what if it's something that could potentially ruin us?....

i sigh, just thinking about it makes my head hurt. kenma spent an awfully long amount of time in the toilet at the cafe, then cut our time short and left after paying the bill. i was left to wonder what puzzle piece i misplaced. was it something i said? perhaps it was the fact that he felt like i mocked him for liking such a girly cafe?

my finger stops by a photo, for a moment there i almost scroll down, but it looks familiar... that bracelet - it must be kenma's. as i open up the profile, i no longer have doubts.

"bingo", i whisper under my breath.

this is definitely kenma's account. as pastel and floral as it can be. the posts aren't exactly what i would imagine kenma to post, i honestly would expect volleyball stuff and gaming posts - yet this is a completely new thing. even more interesting are the captions. life from kenma's point of view.

the most recent picture is from yesterday, two days after we had gone to that cafe. it's a journal picture with a cute mug on the side. the mug has a cute llama drawing on it and is pastel pink in colour, the journal has many tiny doodles and texts, pictures and some dried flowers. from what i can understand he made it himself.

the caption reads 'i feel like an idiot, i almost went ahead and did it. i almost told everyone... i need to cool my head, be alone for a while before i lose my calm...'

he seemed to have quite a following, more importantly he seemed to have people who knew what he was talking about it. went ahead and said what? i take back my words. kenma is not a puzzle piece missing a few pieces, no, he's an entirely new set and i had been staring at the cover this whole time, thinking i had it all figured out.

the more i scrolled down, the more i realized that kenma... has a different side to him. he makes journals, it seems like. he likes drying flowers, posts cute recipes - i only now realize how little i actually know about kenma.

now that i think back, i... never asked him about anything. it came naturally, some things at least, we have been friends since we were little kids. he used to always ask me questions, but i never asked him anything.

ah, yes, this guilt. this guilt has started eating me from the inside.

but i am determined to keep searching. i will uncover whatever kenma is worried about. i am his best friend - i can support him through whatever.

now that i think about it even more... this obsession to find out what is bothering him, this sadness for not knowing why he's hurt, this guilt for potentially hurting kenma at some point before they all lead back to one thought i had before and have been denying since.

i... might have different feelings for kenma, ones that could get our friendship ruined - so i will keep them to myself and myself only.

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Ok good luck Kuroo
I'm sure everything will turn out great

Anyway I hope you all enjoyed!

Hatari.