Jewel

Chapter 15

*15 years old*

Sophomore year has been going well so far I guess. It's one of those years in high school where nothing much happens. Like, you're not a freshman anymore, but no one treats you any better until you're an upperclassman. The only class people kind of know me in is art because the teacher is always showing some of my work. At first it was really cool that she would use me as an example in class, but now the kids just hate me because she uses my stuff so much. But hey, it's not my fault she likes my work.

I entered the reflections contest again this year. I've won something just about every year I've entered since the seventh grade although I didn't even know it until I got to school. Ursula ripped up my award letters and threw them away the first couple of years before I even knew I had them. So the past couple of years, I had my letters sent to Blake's house and Mrs. Todd helped me open my first bank account to start saving for college. I've started babysitting a little bit too, but kids don't really seem to like me so I'm usually never called back more than once or twice.

I just mind my own business in class and enjoy spending time with Blake after school and on the weekends. School has become a bit more demanding because I'm in harder classes, but I seem to manage just fine. I don't even know why I'm bothering to stress myself over grades because they aren't that important for art school. Blake and I have started looking around for colleges together. They say it's never too early to start.

Blake really enjoys helping those who can't help himself, that's why he either wants to be a lawyer or a fireman. I'm trying to push him towards law because he'll make more money, but he says that's not important. He would like the eventfulness of a fireman better.

I really want to go to the Art Institute of California at Los Angeles, but I can't really afford out of state tuition. All of the money my parents had saved for me, Ursula has used 50 times over so I'm pretty much on my own. I'll probably end up at the Art Institute in Portland and I'll just commute to school to save money.

Jackson is leaving for the army this weekend and I am really upset. It's not like I ever saw him and I'm going to miss the sibling things we would do together, but knowing that his life is in danger and he will be in troubled areas all over the world really troubles me. I tried everything in my power to convince him not to join the military, but he kept insisting that it was the only way to make sure that he never had to come back to this hellhole. He wants to get out as much as I do, but there are other ways to do it. Every time I walk past his room, it gets emptier and emptier. He has already cut his hair military style and has his uniform dry cleaned and ready to go. At this point, it's just a waiting game. He heads to Colorado in three days and I'm not ready to say goodbye.

Ursula is obviously happy that she has one less mouth to have to feed. Actually, that's a joke. She hasn't fed us since... ever, but she's just happy to have one less person in the house. I'm going to be the one who will miss having the mouth to feed being as I am the cook of the house. I will miss doing his laundry and picking up his room and hearing him stumble in at night after being out with his friends until two in the morning. I'm going to miss the rare and seemingly meaningless times he would actually spend with me as I did my homework and he just sat and watched me. I'm going to miss embarrassing him around girls and his friends. I'm even going to miss the times he would call me names and stomp away mad because at least he was here to call me something. I just really going to miss him.

Savanna is vying for some top model position in a magazine... or may it was the America pageant. I don't really know or care. All I know is that I will be dragged to that one whenever it is because Ursula insists that she will need help that time. They've been doing this for how many years now and she still wants my help? I kind of have bigger things to worry about at the moment.