Remembered Promises

Chapter 17

It had been a few days since Jonah's Mom was weened off of sedation. All of her vitals were stable but she hadn't woken up yet. Jonah couldn't take it anymore. He had been sitting at the hospital day after day and his nerves were fried. He told the doctor that he was going to head home for some sleep. But what he was actually going to do was drown his sorrows in beer. Without Jenna around, he was deep into his dark thoughts. But he did what was best for her. His future was already ruined but he refused to let hers be ruined over his messed up life. Edwin was right. She had a bright future ahead of her and he had promised himself he wouldn't get in the way of that.

He could barely focus driving home. He needed to drown his sorrows in beer and then sleep for 24 hours. He pulled into the carport and cut the engine off. He put this head back and closed his eyes. He couldn't help but let a few tears fall down his cheeks. Seeing his Mom like this was killing him. He sat by her hospital bed practically willing her to open her eyes and smile at him.

"Jonah, stop torturing yourself!" He screamed out loud. He punched the steering wheel over and over until his knuckles bled. He groaned out loud and finally got out of the car to head into his cave. He immediately went to the fridge and pulled an ice cold beer out. He opened it and chugged it. He threw the bottle to the floor shattering it. He pulled out another one and immediately chugged that one too. He could already feel his senses dulling and that's just what he needed. He grabbed 3 more out of the fridge and sat in front of the TV. He turned it on just to fill the room with noise. Finishing off the beers, Jonah sat there until he drifted off. Nightmares filled his dreams but at least he was sleeping.
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Jenna had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. It had been three days since she had talked to Jonah. Afterwards she decided, along with her Mom, that it was good to give him some space. But he hadn't texted or called. She was worried that he wasn't doing well. She decided to head up to the hospital. She didn't care if he got mad or yelled at her. She just wanted to make sure he was okay. The whole drive to the hospital she had butterflies in her stomach. When she finally made her way up to the ICU, he wasn't there. The nurse informed her that he hadn't been there since yesterday. She thanked the nurse and decided to head to his house.

When she pulled into the carport she was relieved to see his car there. She took a few deep breaths and slowly got out of her car and headed to the front door. She knocked but no one came to the door. She knocked again but still no answer. She turned the doorknob hoping that it was unlocked and fortunately enough, it was. When she walked in her heart filled with dread. There was shattered beer bottles on the kitchen floor and beer bottles sitting on the coffee table. This was what she feared. He had started drinking again, so that meant he wasn't doing well. He had always turned to alcohol when things had gotten bad after his Dad died. Her heart hurt for him.

"Jonah." She called out. No answer. She decided to head to his bedroom. The door was shut so she slowly turned the handle to make sure he was in there. She peeked her head in and there he was, sound asleep in his bed. Jenna hadn't realized that she was holding her breath until she got dizzy. She finally regulated her breathing and shut his door quietly. She was so relieved to see him sleeping peacefully. Even if it had required a six pack of beer, at least he was safe at home. Jenna decided she was going to go clean up the mess and wait for him to wake up.

After a few hours she finally heard his bedroom door open. She had no idea what to expect from him, so she braced herself for the worse.

"Jenna?" He asked as he rubbed his eyes. Jenna slowly stood up.

"Hi." She said quietly as she stood up. She couldn't help that her hands were slightly trembling. He slowly walked towards her. She couldn't read the expression on his face.

"Did you clean up?" He asked. She shook her head yes. "I don't deserve you." He whispered as he wrapped his arms around her. She took in his scent and relaxed in his arms. "I'm sorry I snapped at you. All of this has been very hard on me but that was no reason to treat you that way." He pulled her back so he could look into her eyes. She couldn't help the traitorous tears that fell down her cheeks. "Come on, let's sit down."

They sat down on the couch and he pulled her into his arms. "Jonah, are you okay?" She asked.

"Now that you're here, yes. It was just too much. They weened my Mom off of the sedation meds but she still hasn't woken up. Jenna, what if she never does?" He said in a cracked voice.

"Jonah, don't think like that. She will wake up." Jenna said quietly.

"I'm so scared she won't." He said as he started trembling.

"Hey, it's going to be okay. I promise. I'm not leaving your side until we figure this out. You're not alone." Jenna said as she hugged him tighter. He pulled back and looked into her eyes. It felt like he was looking directly into her soul. He leaned down and kissed her so passionately that it took her breath away. She realized how much she had missed him these last couple of days in that moment.

"I don't know what I'd do without you." He said as he kissed her again. She couldn't help but melt into him. But she didn't think this was a good idea. Especially with the head space that he was in.

"Jonah, maybe we should stop." She said quietly.

"I want you and I need this. I love you, Jenna." He said quietly as he kissed her cheek softly. She looked into his eyes and decided to throw caution to the wind.