“Pancakes again? That’s the third time this week. And today’s Wednesday for fuck’s sake.” I was complaining about how often we have pancakes while eating said pancakes. “If you don’t like them, why are you eating them?” Neil asked. “I’m hungry.” Was all I said as I ate one of them. “Hey Max, the weird-ass cloak people are back.” “Cloak people-oh. Those guys. Didn’t they leave after what happened to Chuckie last year?” I laughed a bit. “Yeah, he was messed up after that. Haha.” I may or may not have completely messed up his whole mindset on life. He’s fine though …physically speaking. I just ate my breakfast, ignoring the weird-ass cloak people. After a little while, I heard thunder outside and sighed. “Aaaand now it’s raining. Just like last time. Why does it always rain when they come?” Max just shrugged and I heard David say that Dolph was in charge. This totally isn’t going to be entirely fucked up I thought sarcastically. After a few minutes, Dolph passed out sheets of construction paper for everyone. “Come now, mein friends. Let us express ourselves through the glory of macaroni art!” He was walking across the table while lifting his legs high like the Nazis did.
Not that I know anything about that, just being a kid and all. “Man, this is lame. I miss Chuckie.” “Who’s Chuckie?” Nikki asked Max after he said that. “Chuckie was here last year. Shayla here fucked up his head and now he can’t even come near the place.” Nikki’s eyes sparkled. “Wooow. How did you do it?!” She was practically laying on the table so she could get in my face. “You really wanna know?” I asked, a slight smirk on my face. “Uh-huh!” “You really wanna know how I messed him up so goddamn badly?” “Just tell us already,” Max said in a bored tone before Nikki could say anything else. “Ok. I’ll tell.” I stretched a little and got comfy. “So Chuckie was a spoiled brat. He was fucking awful. His blonde hair had to be perfect, not a single hair out of place. And his shoes weren’t even built like normal shoes! They were just ovals! You know how shoes are shaped for each foot or some shit like that? Well, he didn’t do that. And his tent was even worse-“ “Look, stop talking about his fucking tent and get to the point.” Max interrupted since he already knew everything. “Shut the fuck up Max.” He glared at me, but I just continued. “Anyway, one day this kid’s having a huge temper tantrum about how the curtains on the theatre weren’t even. For the fifth time in two days! And one of my friends always tried to comfort him and make him feel better, but this guy was in such a fucking tizzy that he hit her! And I kinda just snapped, I guess. I lifted him up by his shirt collar and had him watch as I messed up everything he was wearing and everything in his goddamn tent.” “That’s it?” Nikki asked. She seemed kinda unimpressed. “Then I almost drowned him in the lake and left him in a bear cave to either be eaten alive or starve to death. He did eventually make it back, and with a few wounds, but the guy was shaking and terrified of everything. He wouldn’t even drink from a fucking water bottle after that.” Nikki’s eyes were wide and sparkling again. “Wow. That sounded awesome! I wish I could have been there.” She started eating some of the macaroni and complained about how sucky it was. “I wanna go get some pudding! I bet we can fit 20 in our pockets this time. What do you think Neil?” She turned to face him, but he wasn’t there. “Wait, where’s Neil?” Max asked. I was curious too, but then I remembered his hiding place and smiled a little. He’s just off writing in his diary. Nurf and Harrison (who was being bullied by Nurf) said they had some idea as to where he was, but just that they saw him with SK this morning. Nikki and Max decided it was a mystery and went to go find him. Have a good time. Fucking idiots.
I went back to my macaroni art and ended up making a dolphin. Great job Shayla. You made a dolphin. Mom would love this... After a while, Dolph changed it so we were colouring instead, and I half-assed it. It was of some German pig saying “Guten tag!” Next thing I know, Dolph is standing on a table yelling about how someone was hiding from his divine presence and that it was unacceptable. “Ve shall make an example of him! Let ze hunt begin!” I guess that he was cutting construction paper because at some point he got a piece of black paper on his lip and it looked like a Hitler moustache. The resemblance was way too fucking similar. He then gave each of us a number and had us go look for him. But I didn’t do that. I sat back down and put my feet on the table. “Vhat are you doing?” I heard the Hitler reincarnation ask. “Sitting here.” “You should be looking for ze missing camper.” I looked at him, and I had to lean a bit because he was hidden by my feet. Fucking shorty. “He’s not missing. He’s just hiding so he can be alone.” “No. He is missing.” He insisted and I just rolled my eyes. “Whatever.” Dolph walked away and I sighed. Then I realized something and laughed. “Neil, who’s Jewish, is being hunted by Dolph, who looks more like Hitler now than he did before. And Neil’s in the attic. This is far too perfect.” I laughed a little while longer before looking for the others. But, as I was walking, I noticed a hole. “That must be from Preston after Dolph said we should search the floorboards. He’s such a goddamn idiot sometimes.” I covered the hole by getting a wooden crate-box thing from the kitchen and putting it over the hole. “Now we won’t get animals at least.” Just as I was about to go to the others, they came out with Neil, who had a defeated look on his face. Guess they found out about his diary. I looked back at the creepy-ass cloak guys, and they smiled as they held out an award. David smiled wide when he saw it, but then he froze when they walked past him and to Dolph. I couldn’t help but laugh a least a little. “High five!” Dolph was holding his arm up like a Nazi salute while asking for high fives. Is this kid seriously that much of a fucking idiot? I decided to blow him off like I do everything and grabbed my macaroni art. I looked at it for a few seconds, then crumpled it up and tossed it into the trash can. “That was actually pretty cool. Why’d you throw it away?” Next to me was Gwen, and I just had a bored look on my face. “Because it doesn’t matter? It’s just macaroni art.” “But you looked pretty attached to it. People don’t usually get lost in thought when they look at something that doesn’t matter.” I got kinda angry at her after that. “I said it doesn’t matter. It’s just some shitty macaroni art. It isn’t anything to fucking treasure.” “Alright, alright. Relax.” She lifted her hands in surrender and walked away. Dammit. That night I ended up falling asleep while thinking about the person that the art was for.
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Shayla's Camp Camp Adventure{Discontinued}
Fanfiction{Cover art by @Soooperrgirl edited by me} When a child goes back to a camp she hates, she'll reunite with all the BS they give her 24/7.
