Everything was empty. The walls that surrounded me. The space I occupied. My mind. My heart. My soul. Even Kaleo was quiet. Silence. It's the most powerful scream. That's what I wanted to do right now, scream. Because maybe if I screamed all this pent up rage and pain could be released. Maybe if I screamed it would all just go away.
But I couldn't scream. There was a lump in my throat and a wire pulled tight around my lungs. I was suffocating too much to scream.
Zillah was dead.
I'd killed somebody.
This time it felt real because this time it wasn't a Collector. This was someone- as cruel as they were- they were on our side. Axel could've helped. He could fly the ship and most importantly he had an army. How were we supposed to show up at their base without their leader.
Show up with his killer saying they wanted to help. No. Not killer. Murder. I was a murderer. The scars on my arm stung. A reminder.
The ship jolted forward and I flew across the room.
"What in the-" the ship jolted agin, like we were turning around. "We're going back!" I jumped to my feet, a mistake. The ship rocked and I fell back to my knees. Still, a spark of hope had erupted inside of me. Cate was down there and we were going to get her back. We were going to succeed at something. Finally.
Get up.
Stop being useless,
And go help.
"The last time you convinced me to help I killed and ally.
Don't fool yourself.
He was not our ally.
"He could've helped." I started to inch up again, using the wall of the ship as it shuttered.
You'll survive without him.
"Whatever." I growled, not in the mood to get in an insufferable conversation with him. With myself really. That was the thing about having voices in your head, it wasn't something you could just walk away from.
Even before I reached the cockpit the overwhelming stench of blood hit my nose. It made me stop. It made me think. There was a possibility I could kill someone close to me. That maybe when we landed back on the planet and when we found Cate that maybe I should just disappear. They would be better off without me screwing things up. Sure I could be an asset on the battle field, but I was also a liability. I was dangerous and unprintable. I wasn't really needed.
"Max, better buckle down." Torryn said when he noticed me standing in the doorway. Jasper was at the controls and when he looked back all I saw was fear in those big eyes. I really was a monster.
I moved to the farthest chair from the rest of them and strapped myself in. It obviously wasn't going to be an easy ride.
"Hey... You okay?" Torryn looked back over his shoulder, concern written on his face. There was a day he would've look at me with disgust.
YOU ARE READING
The Red Defenders - Completed
Ciencia Ficción• This is the second book of The Collected series • "Those who bring pain are here to save, and those who bring hope will bring death. A great evil rests on the horizon, eating away at each setting sun. Nothing is as it seems while you beg for salva...