An Unforeseen Turn of Events

Chapter Sixty-Nine

Ryan paced and kept looking around the street. How he wished Christine would have answered her phone. He lost count of the number of times he tried to reach her. Whenever he eyed their front door, his shoulders tilted up and he quickly looked away, the prospect of entering the house far too daunting. He kept putting one foot toward the door but then he lost his nerve and backed away. He carried flowers and was dressed in a dark formal suit, a sign of respect upon entering a mourner's home. Christine opened the front door. She wore a black dress with a torn white sweater. He then recalled from visiting his Jewish friends after a funeral that mourners wore a torn garment at the shiva sitting.

Christine had tired, haggard eyes and pale skin. She lost too much weight and she covered her trembling hands in an effort for him not to notice as she approached.

Even though she was clearly distressed, Ryan thought she still looked beautiful, as captivating as when he first came across her twenty years ago. She tried to appear strong but he wished he could just take her in his arms and tell her everything was going to be all right.

But they were not the same people they were twenty years ago. He took a deep breath and prayed his parents would adhere to his strict instructions of staying in the car in front of the house. He looked over at them. Their faces were tight and anguished, realizing the family had experienced an unspeakable loss.

When Christine reached him, she moved her mouth but no words came out. He grasped her hand and said, "I'm so sorry, Christine. I really am."

She stared at the pavement and nodded.

"Whatever you and the twins need, I'll be here for you."

Tears welled up in her eyes. "There's a lot I have to do, a lot of adjustments that have to be made. . ."

"I'll do whatever I can to help."

She shook her head, still staring at the ground. "I've got to handle all this by myself. I never told you about the kids and I'm not asking to be rescued. I've got to figure things out on my own."

"Jesus, Christine! We're not just talking about you here," Ryan stared at the sky, clearly exasperated. "We have the kids to think about."

Now Christine covered her face and sobbed.

Ryan attempted to console her. He touched her arm and said, "Christine. Christine? Can you hear me? Let me know you're listening."

She nodded.

"Listen, I understand why you never told me about the twins. You were right, I wouldn't have wanted them because I was in no way, shape, or form ready to have kids back then." He paused, then said, "I am not quite sure if I'm ready now, but they're here and you know what?"

Christine rubbed her eyes. "What?"

"You have to look at me before I tell you."

She reluctantly stared into his eyes, still sniffing.

"I'm glad they're here. You've done a great job raising them. I know I had nothing to do with it."

Christine hugged herself, unwilling to smile or acknowledge his praise. She whispered, "Daniel was a very devoted father too."

"I know that. I'll always be indebted to him. You got yourself a good man, Christine."

"You mean I did." Her tears came trailing down again. She breathed and put her fist to her mouth but was unable to stem the tears.

"I know that, but I'm going to help out now. They're almost grown but I still can do something." Again he paused. "Where will they be in the fall?"