Separated Love

Chapter 26: Kartik and Naira Discuss Pregnancy

"Kartik... say something..." I look at him worried. I'm just as scared as he is.

"Naira, I don't want a kid right now." He finally manages to get the words out.

"What if I'm pregnant though?" I think about it and my symptoms could honestly just be me PMSing with the cravings and all. This isn't anything new. Then again, I am late which rarely happens. I've also been so stressed this past month. So much has happened.

"I don't know Naira." Kartik whispers. "Naira, I just don't want a kid at this point in time. I want us to be alone for a little while longer."

"I mean this isn't ideal for me either Kartik. I just started focusing on my career, but if this is what God wants then this is what's going to happen."

"Naira, how can you be so casual about this?" I sense an argument coming. "We JUST got back together. You still need surgery. You've started taking classes, and I'm going to a therapist for my drinking problems. You think we can handle a baby with all of this?"

"Did I not just say that this isn't an ideal time for me either? Why do you keep putting words in my mouth?"

"How am I putting words in your mouth? You're literally saying that if you're pregnant then we just have to go with it." I'm shocked by his statement.

"So... you want me to abort?" Kartik looks at me surprised and sees what he said wrong. It's too late though. I'm already hurt. My mood swings have already been intolerable, and I don't know if my reaction is reasonable but the anger within me just keeps rising.

"No that's not what I meant Naira. I don't know what I'm saying. I just need time to process all of this, okay?"

"You know Kartik, IF I am pregnant and THIS is your reaction to it, I'll never forgive you."

"Naira, if we were trying to have a child, my reaction would be different. I think the way I'm reacting is very reasonable. I'm thinking PRACTICALLY." As Kartik shouts this word we hear a knock on the bedroom door. Kartik turns toward the window while I go to open the door.

"Kartik, Bitiya Rani, let's have a talk outside. I don't mean to intrude -"

"Nani please don't say that," Kartik exclaims as he turns toward her. "You're an elder and have every right to give your input. I'm sorry if we were being super loud too. We should've considered that you're trying to sleep." I nod in agreement with Kartik. We all follow Nani to the couches in the living room.

"Look kids. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing when it happens at the right time." Nani looks at me when she says this. "I know the circumstances right now aren't ideal. It's good that you two are talking this through because it seems like you've never discussed this before." Kartik and I look at each other acknowledging that she's right. "This discussion should have happened before a pregnancy scare. Nonetheless, you two are arguing as if Naira is for sure pregnant. Naira, have you even taken a pregnancy test since SuhasiniJi (Dadi) asked to find out this morning?" I shake my head. Kartik and I look down because it's evident that we both are arguing for no reason. "How about you two go and get a pregnancy test, and find out first whether Naira is pregnant. Take this time to also discuss where you two stand on when you want to have a child. Remember to remain calm when discussing this. You both know by now that arguing about this is only going to make things worse." We both nod in agreement with Nani. "Okay kids go for a drive, get a pregnancy test, and discuss everything like ADULTS." She laughs. "I swear you two are still little babies too."

"Nani, Kartik is always going to remain a baby even after we have one." We both laugh.

"Yeah so? The child will never feel lonely." We all start laughing together. Kartik and I get up to go to our car. Kartik opens the door for me, and places my crutches in the backseat. He gets into the driver's seat. We both look at each other and say sorry at the same time.

"Naira, I want a few more years alone with you, and I want your undivided attention." His blatant honesty makes me smile.

"Kartik, you'll always have my attention. You're always going to be my number 1 priority."

"Naira, that's simply not true and you know that. I know I'll always be your priority but things change when you have a kid. You enter a new phase of your life where you need to show growth and maturity. I just want to enjoy our youth while we still have it. I want to only be with you." Everything he says makes me melt inside. I run the back of my fingers on his cheek and tell him I understand. "If you are pregnant though, I don't want to abort. I would never ask that of you."

"Thank you Kartik. I needed to hear that." I kiss him on the cheek. "Let's wait to have a child if the result comes back negative. If we are pregnant though, here goes nothing." We both nervously laugh and drive to the pharmacy to get a test. Once we get it, we come back home and then wait a minute for the results. This seems like the longest minute of my life. Kartik is pacing back and forth in the bathroom. Finally the results are here, we both look at the result and have tears streaming down our faces.

"Why are you crying?" I ask Kartik through my own tears.

"Because in all honesty, for a minute I had accepted you were pregnant and was mentally preparing myself and getting slightly excited for a mini you." We both cry for reasons we can't comprehend. The results came back negative and even though we don't want a child right now, I guess somewhere inside we also know we are ready for tiny versions of us.

The next day everyone leaves and my break comes to an end. I study for my exam, while Kartik finishes grading assignments for our class. We both feel like the apartment is completely empty without our families. Once we finish our work, we go for a walk outside to avoid the emptiness in our apartment, and I wear my boot for the first time instead of using crutches.

"I need to ask these doctors if we can get you something other than that boot."

"Why?" I get confused.

"You could cause some serious damage to others with that boot if you get mad, Sherni." I start cracking up. We watch the sunset at the park, and then make our way back home. Just the two of us.

After tomorrow I'll be done with my first ever class for business administration. I'm so excited for myself. I can't wait to be done so I can take another step forward toward my aspirations of starting a chain dance academy in the United States.

I jot down what goals I have for the upcoming months

-Finish my first business administration class
-Get surgery done on my ankle
-Start dancing again
-Make a trip with Kartik to the United States for my dance academy
-Gayu Di's Wedding!!!!
-Baby Kaira or Kairav?

The thought of a mini-me, Kaira, or a mini-Kartik, Kairav gives me butterflies inside. Our own little child that we will get to raise together. Our own little family. I look over at Kartik who has been trying to get my attention for the past hour.

"Imagine mini versions of us, Kartik." He smiles and pulls me closer to him.

"Soon Naira." He kisses my forehead and turns off the lights.

Author's Notes

I will be writing a lot to get this story moving without leaving any loose ends so be prepared for a lot more chapters! Hope you enjoy this!