A Fallen $tar

A Fallen $tar: I was your vampire certain as the moon

Later, that night. I laid in bed. Evan beside me. She was fast asleep, unlike me who had been starring at a inanimate, black, speck on the ceiling for the past 2 and a half hours. My vision was so blurry. It got worse and worse everyday.

I was cold, hungry, tired, and had a headache. But, it seemed to be one of those nights where you just wanted to be cold. You just wanted to starve yourself. Your eyes burned every time you closed them, and all the things above gave you much more to think about, than getting a pill to kill the pain.

I awoke in the morning to Evan jumping all over me. "Wake up Brian, wake up, wake up, wake up-"

"Evan, stop it!" I yelled at her, she stopped and starred at me blankly. Her smile disappeared.

"I didn't get much sleep last night, just give me a few-" Suddenly, she slapped me. To my surprise.

"You're such an asshole Manson, I fucking hate it."

Instead of giving her the reaction she would like, I just paused. Then calmy replied. "Yeah, well I guess you should have paid attention to who you fell in love with. But you can suck my dick for all I care." I began to role back over and go to sleep.

"I was, but you always gotta be a dick yourself! I FUCKING HATE IT!!!" She pulled the comforters up over my face, and started to suffocate me.

I was fighting to get away but I just couldn't. Panicking, Yelling, begging her to stop. She finally released her grip and sat up, straddling me now. I immediately jumped up, throwing her into the floor.

"You're crazy Evan- you're fucking insane!" Blood ran down my face from the scratches she had also left behind. She was gasping for breath. Surprisingly, with a smile on her face. I was scowling down at her.

Lily walked up purring, I leaned over and snatched her. I stroked her fur as I walked away. Evan started to sob, but I carred not .

I went down into my basement, letting Lily jump gracfully out of my arms onto the floor. I walked and pulled the chain to the small light in the middle of the room. All my paints were scattered, just as usual. I gathered them and grabbed a bottle of Absinth out of the fridge. Sitting in the floor, I starred at the blank canvas. I needed to get out all these emotions inside, but how I could lay them out on paper was unknown to me.

Sitting for hours I drank all my alcohol before I could use it for my painting. I laid over on my side, curling up into my most comforted position. I fell asleep.

Waking up to soft air on my face, it was warm, the ground was soft. As much as I wanted to lay there in peace I knew this wasn't right. Suddenly, a hand laid on my shoulder. Before I could open my eyes Twiggy's voice sweetly fell into my ear. "I'll see you again." I sat up, no one. No where. Same place. Nothing changed.

I held my chest, it was tight. I reached up and grabbed my inhaler from the desk. My back was so tense, god I was getting older.

I pulled myself up the stairs, Coming up to Evan fixing breakfast. Instead of a normal man, who would smile and be appreciative of their lover. I frowned, the acrimony stirred inside. I walked to the table, my feet dragged then I dropped to the chair.

After a while of stiff silence, I choked up some words. "You're going to eat all of that by yourself?"

She quickly snapped back "Of course not, FIANCE, You will be eating this with me-" She paused suddenly. Then slowly looked back at me. "-Won't you?"

"Ha! of course not." I stood with a sarcastic expression. I gripped onto the edge of the table with fury.

"And why NOT?!" She turned and looked at me, those blue eyes had turned cold, grey, deranged!

"After yesterday? absolutely no." I started towards the stairs.

"I'M FUCKING DONE!" A crash happened behind me. I turned around to find she had thrown the pan of food behind her. As she started to destroy my kitchen in a fit of rage, I ran to stop her. She yelled and spit words of hate and fire. Finally crossing the line with "GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOUSE YOU UNGRATFUL, SELFISH, FAG! I do EVERTHING, for you. But you simply throw my love away!-" That's where it ended. She only thought SHE was done. She had no idea how long I had already been done.

"No, Evan. You get out. You aren't appreciative of me-"

"I don't throw your love away!"

"No, you don't...You take it, and do unbeilevably horrid things to it! YOU SLAUGHTER, MY LOVE, EVAN!" I started to walk towards her, tears poored down my face. Burning the scratches from the morning before "I give you everything, We're one, against all others. If I was your vampire, you would trully love me maybe! I apoligize that I am the one who attempts to defend myself when it gets to the point of murder sometimes. I apoligize that I cannot fofill all of your highest dreams, I apoligize that I am a HUMAN, FUCKING, BEAN!" My voice cracked. I fell to her feet sobbing.

Without a sound she left. She packed her stuff, and was gone. Ginger, Tim and Pogo were the only ones left now. I got up to watch her leave. As she sped out of my driveway I was in a daze. Allot of thoughts were rushing through my head all at once. I wasn't happy, not at all. Expecting a great relief. But instead, a great hole had been dug in my heart.