geed | clairo

three

i woke up in my twin sized bed, my heart racing and wearing only a pair of boxers, with my blanket on the floor. i turned over and looked at spencer's side of the room: his bed was empty and looked like he hadn't been in it since yesterday. i unplugged my phone from my charger and took it off my nightstand. there were a few notifications that i cared to check: texts from the people i was with last night.

spencer knight: boutta fuck sam, joanne was a bummer

spencer knight: maybe hes gonna fuck me actually

jesse stewart: u good bro?

jesse stewart: dropped spence off at sam's dorm, he said he'd nurse his hangover or smthing

jesse stewart: joanne is so sweet, i wish spence would either treat her better or just move on

brady field: come over to the house today, we gotta talk about spring semi

i sat up and ran a hand through my hair. my head was pounding and i knew we were out of painkillers since spencer and i sold them all to geed freshmen last month. the last thing i felt like doing was walking the short distance to the frat house. i would be blinded by the sun and i couldn't drive there since my truck was still in the shop being repaired.

i finally decided to get up and get dressed. i changed into a pair of black mid-length athletic shorts and applied deodorant before putting on the gray tee i got last semester emblazoned with "new orleans university cross country" in blue. i slid on my birkenstocks and slipped on a pair of round sunglasses, making sure i had my phone and wallet in my pockets before leaving.

st. charles is simply beautiful, especially on a saturday when there's no sporting events that warrants a tailgate. joggers were sparse since it was about noon so i was the only person on the street. i was wrong. i spotted a girl wearing an oversized white t-shirt with a pair of what looked like mom jeans on the sidewalk in front of the house. she had her phone out, pointed directly at it as if she were in the middle of taking a picture. as i got closer, i concluded she was taking pictures.

"hey, what are you doing?" i asked, about a few feet away from her at this point. through my tinted view, i could make the safe assumption that she had brown hair that stopped around mid-chest and eyes that were either green, blue or maybe a combination.

"it's for an art assignment."

"what's the art assignment?" i questioned. i slipped my sunglasses up so they rested in my hair and my eyes began to burn slightly. the weird thing was that i wasn't facing the sun: her eyes were somewhat intimidating and burned a hole through me as she stared back at me.

"it's, um, architecture. we have to, uh, draw pictures of interesting pieces of architecture in new orleans," she responded, continuing to look me in the eye. her voice didn't match her eyes. for every way her eyes were fierce and attacking, her voice was the opposite: soft and inviting.

"that's cool. make sure to get our letters in your, uh, drawing."

"of course, i don't want people in my class thinking that this is the house of a bunch of, you know, geeds."

"are you a geed?" i asked.

"i'm a goddamned independent and proud," she replied, a smile beginning to form on her lips.

"fucking geeds, am i right?" i joked, trying to get her eyes to match the warmth of her smile.

"no, fucking frat boys, am i right? especially theta xi guys who pump and dump girls who really like them and ghost them and make them feel like shit," she retorted, her smile fading into something more malicious.

"hey, let's not genera-"

"i'm just saying. your house might be pretty, but the people inside aren't," she interjected. she began to walk away from me and towards the street with restaurants and small businesses. goddamnit. the back of her shirt had a weezer graphic, from around the time they dropped the green album.

i walked into the house to find it cleaner than usual. there were no bottles or cups on the floor, nor was there a pungent smell of either weed, alcohol or piss.

"brady! where are you?" i shouted. about thirty seconds later, i heard footsteps down the stairs and i saw brady emerge from the other side of the house, wearing only a pair of navy sweatpants and his brown hair sporting a bed head look.

"sup, man," greeted brady, as we joined hands and gave a small hug to each other.

"so, how's the planning for semi going?" i asked, making sure he knew the reason i got out of bed this lovely afternoon.

"not too bad. you know that pledge blane, the tall one that skates?"

"yeah, is he helping you?"

"this motherfucker's uncle owns that nice ass hotel about twenty minutes away. i booked the ballroom for free. and it's nice as fuck," explained brady.

securing the right place could be hard, especially around semi-formal season where about 100 fraternities and sororities around new orleans decide that this month is the month they want to hold theirs.

"so, what else needs to be done?" i asked.

"i want you and spencer to help blane and this other kid from his class, aaron, set up. wouldn't kill y'all to find dates either," responded brady, with a small smirk at the end.

"i had a date to the formal last semester."

"she was kind of a dud, man. you should bring that theta phi girl you study with all the time."

"maybe. i'll bring her to our semi and she'll bring me to hers. i think she likes me," i said, toying with the idea of being with georgie. it didn't make me feel anything, specifically happy and it didn't incite butterflies in my stomach, but it made me feel safe and secure.

"paul, you gotta understand women as a whole. if you think they like you, you're probably wrong. if you think you're the only one she's fucking, you're definitely wrong. that's why you have to keep your options open and just have fun with it."

subconsciously, i felt brady and spencer competed over who could be the biggest playboy in our fraternity. brady was a junior, therefore equipped with seniority and a year of experience over spencer. however, spencer combatted that by being 6'2, a great swimmer with the body to back it up and having those friendly blue eyes that could draw anyone he wanted in.

"that doesn't change the fact that i'm bringing georgie. she's cute, nice and an amazing beer pong partner." though everything i said about her was true, it felt like i was trying to force myself to feel something other than study buddy or general chemistry whenever i thought about her.

"i'm just saying, bro. you can't fall for these hoes."

the walk back to my dorm was filled with thoughts of that angsty, artsy girl. she was probably crazy and i shouldn't be thinking that she was interesting or expressive. however, she was interesting and expressive in the way that was detrimental to my thoughts and beliefs.

i didn't fuck girls just to do it, no matter how much my brothers did. hell, even jesse rarely went out with girls. in the two years i had known him, i could only think of two girls he slept with, both older than him and already graduates and both times were after our winter formal, two years in a row. but jesse and i were only the exception to the rule. maybe that geed girl was right: theta xi guys just pump and dump girls for sport.