geed | clairo

eighteen

lara and i were on speaking terms once again. i made sure to look great but casual for her art display at the university showcase. i picked out a university blue striped polo that wasn't too baggy, a pair of khaki shorts and gray new balances so i look put together but not too overboard.

i met her in front of the art center, where she was wearing a pair of her now infamous mom jeans with a striped t-shirt tucked into them. her hair was down and i could see the streaks of blonde and blue that were beginning to fade back into her natural hair color.

"hey." she greeted me tentatively and i smiled at her.

"hey, i can't wait to see your work." the conversation was somewhat awkward and didn't flow as easily, which made me sad. it seems like just yesterday we were discussing each other's hopes and fears, but now it was like we were classmates who had never held a conversation before.

she led me to her display and i began to inspect it. she painted a couple who seemed to be in conversation, in an abstract fashion and with neutral colors save for the bold red in the glasses they were each holding. i scanned and found the title: pour your glass of wine.

"what do you think of it?" lara looked at me slightly nervously, biting her bottom lip softly.

"i-i love it."

"really?"

"if you were selling it, i would buy it," i affirmed.

"how much?"

"huh?"

"how much you would buy my painting for?" questioned lara. i took a slightly deep breath and exhaled through my nose.

"how does one thousand sound?" i offered. it was steep but it was a damn good painting and i would've loved to have it in my room in the frat house since i would live there next semester.

"paul, that's way too much for this," replied lara. she crossed her arms and looked at me.

"no it's not. i want to support you and i want to support your art."

"i-i was joking. i was just gonna-"

"if you let me, i'll buy it for one thousand dollars. i'll give you the money tomorrow and you can give me the painting then so i can send it to my parents' house for safekeeping," i interjected. lara ran a hand through her hair.

"are you sure you want to do this because you want to support art or because you want to go out with me again?" questioned lara.

"i want to support your art. i still like you but if you don't want to go out with me again, i respect that."

"i guess we can arrange everything tomorrow then."

lara and i went to my dorm for a change and ordered pizza. we sat on my bed, our legs crossed and the box between us, as we ate a late dinner.

"god, i forgot how much i hated dorms and living in one," remarked lara.

"i'm so glad i can just move into the house next semester so i'll never have to deal with communal bathrooms ever again," i replied, taking a slice of pepperoni from my pizza and placing it into my mouth.

"i would hate to live in a frat house."

"you wouldn't know the pleasures of it, geed." lara let out a small chuckle and bit into her slice of pizza.

"i missed this," she said.

"me too. like crazy."

"look. i still like you, paul. you are the sweetest guy i've ever met and you are completely selfless. i mean, you wondered if you should make someone else happy even if you would be unhappy," stated lara. i finished my slice of pizza before i answered.