geed | clairo

eight

i couldn't stop thinking about lara. i woke up at about 9am, hoping i could think about something else. i grabbed my phone to check for texts from my friends.

jesse stewart: i like joanne a lot

jesse stewart: she kissed me goodnight when i dropped her off at her dorm :)

spencer knight: sorry about the diane thing

spencer knight: i didn't kno u were fucking her roommate

spencer knight: she's fine af i'm proud of u man

lara holland: can i come over to ur dorm? one of my roommates has been having really loud sex all morning

lara came over, wearing a gray sweatshirt from our college and a pair of striped blue pajama shorts, holding a white bag. i motioned for her to sit on my bed and she did, opening the white bag and taking a donut out. she passed it to me and i did the same, taking a bite out of a glazed donut.

"where's your roommate?" asked lara, breaking our unofficial silence as i finished my first donut.

"he's in someone else's bed, probably trying to find a quiet way to sneak out," i joked. lara smiled and took another donut.

"have you ever fucked a girl and left her alone in the morning?" questioned lara, between bites of her donut.

"no. i'm not the ladykiller you think i am."

"you're a chick magnet, paul. you could have anything you wanted from any girl you wanted," retorted lara.

"including you?"

"what do you want from me?" questioned lara, tucking a lock of hair behind her ears.

"be my date to this semi-formal saturday night. i'll pay for everything," i offered.

"hm, be surrounded by drunken frat boys who might throw up on me for several hours or stay home in my room waiting for my roommates to leave so i can listen to lana del rey and masturbate in peace."

"if we leave early enough, you'll have time to do both," i joked. lara crinkled her nose, unable to suppress her smile.

"i'll be your date." the moment the words left her lips and entered my ears, my heart skipped a beat.

for every ounce of talent lara had for art, she matched it in her music. it was a wednesday night and i sat in the front of a cafe with a green tea in tow, listening to lara perform her original songs. she was wearing the same sweatshirt she wore when i asked her to be my semi-formal date paired with light blue jeans and dirty nike air forces. her guitar, which had a few stickers on it, was on her knee. as she tuned it, she looked up and smiled, looking directly at me.

"i wrote these songs a few nights ago when i couldn't sleep. um, this first one is called bubblegum and i hope you guys like it," began lara, right before strumming her guitar.

"sorry i didn't kiss you, but it's obvious i wanted to. bubblegum down my throat and it's a curse, but my luck couldn't get any worse." lara's voice was beautiful, soft like the notes she played and apologetic like the lyrics she sung. i sipped my green tea while she continued to play, focusing her attention on me. she finished the song, garnering light applause from everyone in the cafe but heavy claps from me. she smiled at me right before starting her next song.

"this one is called ladybug and it's really special to me," began lara, right before she began to play the song. i was entranced by her playing. i sat through the rest of her entire set, unable to do anything but just listen.