Blood Buddy / Fransykes

Chapter 30

"Hmm..."

What am I going to do with Tammy?

We've already established that I'm not going to kill her. Even before I quit, that was never an option. That's not enough pain for her.

I sighed, turning the page of my book. I had been taking this 'stopping killing' thing pretty seriously, I even got this book, it's about recovering from an addiction. You see, murder is not only a hobby for me, it's an addiction. This is why I'm hoping that this book can help me in some way, any way. Because I'm always thinking about it, not as much as I think about Josh, but I think about it a lot. I wake up, I think about decapitating somebody. I eat my breakfast, lunch and dinner, I think about eviscerating somebody. I rest my head to go to bed, I think about burning somebody alive.

"To ignore symptoms of withdrawal, the addict must occupy their mind with another activity." I read those words, Josh was listening to me. He was supporting my decision, but he didn't really get it. He just liked to kill people too much, and that was his choice. Nothing wrong with that, of course. Josh can do no wrong.

"Hmm... what activities do you like to do?" He asked, his arms wrapped around me as we sat on his couch. Amy was actually allowed out of the basement now, she was currently standing in the livingroom with us. She still hadn't spoken a word to me, I think she was embarrassed.

"Hmm... I like to paint, I like to sing, I like to watch romantic movies." Those were only a few things I could think of. I'm sure there were more. Murder was just a daily thing I did, it was a hobby, it was a fun pastime. It was also like a drug, I was surely addicted. I even want to do it right now, but I'm not going to. I can ignore the cravings.

"You also like to have sex with me." Josh said, a smug look on his face. I gently pinched his cheek, causing him to chuckle. Silly Joshie.

"Yeah, that too." I smiled, turning the page. That was sorted out then, I would find a new hobby. It can't be that hard, right?

The next page title read: 'The recovering addict must recompose with anybody that they have harmed.' I didn't know how I was going to apologise to my victims, I mean, they were dead... oh! I know exactly how!

A lightbulb went off in my head, I had an idea. I immediately reached into my pocket to pull out my cellphone. I think this is going to make me feel much better. I dialled a number, placing the phone to my ear. I also think this will make the person I'm calling feel much better.

Josh read the page title, seemingly confused as to what I was going to do. Still, he held on tightly to my free hand, squeezing it gently with his. He then continued to place a teensie kiss on my lips, I had the urge to just squeeze his face, but, his scar.

The person that I had called picked up the phone, I felt nerves start to hit me, but it needed to be done. I needed to recover.

"Hello?" They spoke in an unsure tone, probably confused as to who was calling them.

"Hi... is this Matthew Nicholls?" I felt the phone start to shake in my hand, but I couldn't just give up.

"Yes?" He answered. Okay, good.

"The widower of Kelsey Nicholls?" I asked.

"Y-Yeah? Who is this?" His voice was shaky, nervous.

"Oh, hello sir. I just wanted to call to say, um... when I was fourteen, I killed your wife, and I am so incredibly sorry." I gulped.

"What is this? Some kind of sick prank?" He fought defensively.

"Oh, no! I'm completely serious! But, I'm in recovery now, and I've put all of that killing stuff in the past." I smiled, feeling proud of myself. I heard him start to cry over the phone, so I thought I'd say my goodbyes. "Bye sir, have a lovely day." I hung up. "I feel so much better!"