The Grey Area

14

I finally calm down and decide to go wash my face. I walk into the bathroom expecting to find it empty only to find Jahseh sitting on the bathroom floor...with blood dripping down his wrists.

He just smiles up at me with an indistinguishable look in his eye.

"Fucked up right?" He laughs dryly.

"Jahseh..." I trail off as I watch the blood pool from his wrists.

"I guess we both need new ways to cope," he laughs as if there's shit funny about this.

"Jahseh why?" I ask looking into his eyes.

"Come on Kyra, you know why," he laughs.

I look at him confused.

"Cause I'm fucked up, you had no problem saying it before, what's the problem now?" He smiles at me furrowing his brows and crossing his arms as if he's expecting a real answer.

"C'mon Kyra say that shit. I know that's what you're thinking in that pretty, fucked up little brain of yours, cause weithe same Kyra aren't we?" He says.

"Jahseh you're not fucked up, fucking stop," I command.

"Nah we both know it Kyra, it's okay, fuck even my mom know it," he sighs leaning his head back on the wall.

My heart felt like it was being squeezed, my throat felt like it was being crushed, and my stomach felt like it was free falling. It feels as if guilt is trying to suffocate me.

"Jah Jah?" I hear a soft voice call out from the hallway.

Jahseh sighs looking down.

"Don't come in here Aiden," he sighs closing the door so the little boy wouldn't see the horrific sight.

"Why? I gotta go potty!" The little boy whines.

"Go in mommy's bathroom," Jahseh says leaning his head on the door.

"Mommy said not to wake her up."

"Mommy's not here, she left when you went to bed," Jahseh says.

"She said she wouldn't do that anymore..." The boy says sadly.

"Just go to the bathroom Aiden," Jahseh sighs.

"Ok," the boy sniffles walking away.

Jahseh looks at the door and then looks back at his wrists and begins to cry.

"Fuck bruh!" He cries punching the door.

I sit down in front of him and wrap my arms around him as he cries onto my shoulder.

"I just want him to turn out better than me, but she doing the same shit she did to me to him. I don't want him to be like me," he cries.

I just sit there rubbing his back not knowing what to say.

"Jah Jah mommy locked her door!" Aiden whines coming back to the door.

Jahseh sighs slouching back and wipes his tears.

"Hold on Aiden," he says sounding like he has a stuffy nose.

He sniffles before putting on a dirty sweatshirt that was just lying around in the bathroom. We stand up and he opens the door. I see a small boy with the most beautiful big brown eyes.

He looks up at me shyly as if he's wondering why I'm here.

"Go to the bathroom Aiden," Jahseh says gently nudging Aiden into the bathroom.