Strictly Inappropriate (RDJ FanFic)

Part 25 - Emotional Roller-coaster

I'm so nervous. Malcolm's coming up with the elevator and my heart is beating faster and faster by the second. There he is. He looks handsome like always but there's something different about him. He doesn't have the cute honest smile he usually has. He seems worried and zoned out. I can't blame him, I can't even imagine what's going through his head right now. Nothing can be worse than the actual truth.

"Hey" he fake smiles at me.

"Hey" I do the same.

How can I really smile when I know I'm about to hurt a person that cares about me?

"Do you want a drink?" I ask when he's inside the house.

"No, I'm fine. I don't want to put you in trouble" he says kindly.

"Let me rephrase. I'm getting a drink for myself, would you like one too?" I ask.

I need a drink in order to do this.

"In that case, yes" he chuckles.

I smile to the sound of him being happy. I'm pretty sure he won't stay like that for long. I get two glasses of the first bottle I see in front of me and pour the liquor inside them. He's already taken a seat on the couch so I join him and give him his glass.

"Cheers" I say and we both take our first sip.

I take an unusually big sip and he notices it. The confused look he gives me is enough to let me know he's worried.

"So are we going to address to the elephant in the room or are we going to be casual for a while until someone decides to bring it up?" he asks slightly smiling.

"I think I need a few more sips before addressing to the topic" I chuckle and look away.

"Last night we were great and today you're acting weird, what happened that was so bad? If it's about the kiss, I'm sorry. I know we agreed to take things slow, it won't happen again until you feel more comfortable" he begins apologizing.

"It has nothing to do with that. I enjoyed that kiss a lot, you didn't take anything too far" I reassure him.

"Okay, can I kiss you again then? I missed you today" he says a bit embarrassed.

Why does he have to be so goddamn cute? I'm about to cry a river before even starting explaining myself.

"I think it's best for you to hear me out first. Maybe you won't feel the same after that" I gulp sharply.

"Nonsense. Nothing could stop me from wanting to kiss you" he says seriously.

I want to say more but he doesn't let me. He stops me with his rich lips. We share a beautiful slow kiss which makes me more and more emotional each moment.

"Is everything okay?" he asks worried when he notices I'm tearing up.

"No" I shake my head and wipe the first tear that falls down my cheek.

"Talk to me, I hate seeing you like this" he says kindly and holds my hand into his.

"I did something really stupid" I say taking a deep breath to calm myself down.

He does seem more serious and worried than before but his hand is still on mine to comfort me.

"What?" he sounds nervous.

He probably knows what he's about to hear and that's why he sounded like that.

"I slept with someone else" I say and my heart stops beating for a couple of seconds.

I'm waiting for his reaction. I'm serious and I'm looking straight at him. He's not looking in my eyes, he's looking away. He presses his lips against one another and clentches his jaw. I see his eyes getting sadder and his breathing getting deeper. Although, he doesn't look angry, he looks hurt. Just hurt. He takes his hand away from mine and passes it through his hair. He exhales deeply still looking away and then hides his face between his palms before looking at me.