anxiety

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bakugo POV

after kicking deku in the head, i hoped to have knocked some sense into him.
somebody had to.

that idiot was dreaming of something that was impossible. applying to a hero school without a quirk? what the fuck is he thinking?

does he think he can be on the same level as me?

i need to make sure he won't.
i have to train harder.
study harder.
i have to be at the top...

i try to stop my mind pacing as i try to catch my breath.
"shit... it's starting again" i think to myself in fear.

"um... you two go without me, i need to- to go to the bathroom." i lie to akio and taro.

"alright" akio answers. "we'll see you tomorrow then."

i nod, and quickly duck behind a wall, clutching my throat.
my chest tightens every time i try to breathe.
i start to panic and attempt to inhale slowly, but every breath quickly escalates into hyperventilation.

sweat clam in my hands.
my legs fall numb and my head is dizzy.
i collapse into the ground.

"fuck... it's happening again."

my vision is blurred, but i make out a figure running towards me in the distance.
tears fall from my eyes as my vision slowly turns to black.

//flashback//

"kacchan!"

a voice that seems far away echoes through the fire and darkness.
the sludge villain has me immobilised...
suffocation is quickly taking over my body.

"de...ku..." i gasp in between urges to throw up.

"i'm here to save you! kacchan!" his desperate eyes scream.
"you seemed like you were asking for help..."

stop...
stop looking at me with those stupid eyes...
                                  
//flashback over//

"KACCHAN!"
my eyes flutter open to the sight of deku's face. it was bleeding badly from before.

"KACCHAN!" he repeats once more.

...why? no matter how many times i throw you away,

you're always right behind me...
you're always there to save me...

...

why?
i turn my head to see deku with his face in his hands, sobbing like a girl as always.
the room is white, the school nurse is behind deku watching worriedly.

"get lost damn nerd..." i groan.
the pain in my head from the fall aches with every small movement.

"kacchan, i can't leave you now!" he yells in his annoying tone.
stop worrying about me.
i fucking hate it.

"JUST LEAVE DEKU!"
i need him out before i start crying in front of him.

he turns around, limping as he picks up his bag, but he's stopped by the nurse.

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