The Way Back To You

Chapter 29

A P R I L

I crack my knuckles one at a time as my eyes skitter to the clock set up above the wall. Okay, there's only a couple more minutes before the bell. I'm supposed to be paying attention to this class and try to do something good for myself, but the teacher hates me and with all that happened just now I am in no mood to concentrate. 

My body is numb and all that's on my mind is finding everyone next period. I squeeze my eyes shut and slowly let go of my hands, bringing them to a stop on my desk.

Maybe I should have listened to Alex after all and stayed impartial. I shouldn't have opened my mouth. I should have just listened to what Mason was telling me. I shouldn't have asked questions, I should have made sure the halls were cleared, I should have been there at Movie Night.

I sigh and run my hands through my hair. That's what it is though, isn't it? If I had been there that day, Mason and Charity wouldn't have played that god awful game and none of it would have happened.

This is all my fault.

I stop and shake my head. No it's not. It was bound to happen sooner or later. Mason was right, up until now, we've all been avoiding it. It's not something we could avoid.

I just really wish it didn't have to go down the way it did and I hate seeing my friends hurt like this. I rest my chin against the base of my palm and think about how nice it would be to talk to Alex.

I furrow my brow and wonder why he's acting the way he is. Just a few days ago everything was fine between us. We were drinking milkshakes and I was inviting him over to see Ethan. Just a few days before that, he was talking to me about everything going on with my friends. He was giving me advice.

And if he really wants nothing to do with me like he claims, then how come he's been looking out for me since coming to Roosevelt?

If I really am just some girl he met months ago as some cosmic coincidence and nothing more, then why has he continuously made the choice to interact with me?

I know he doesn't mean it.

Does he?

No. I know him. I think I do? But something had to have happened. People don't just change like that overnight. I'm going to figure it out.

I hate to admit it but, now that none of my friends are on speaking terms, Alex is the only one at this whole school who even remotely understands what I'm going through.

I should find and harass him later.

Well, not harass. Talk to. After all, I'm still his stalker.

I smirk to my myself and lay my palms flat out on the desk. Why do things have to be so messed up? Maybe I'm just taking after Yvonne in the way she handles interpersonal relationships. I love her, but despite the fact that she's in college and all grown up now, she has trouble making and keeping friends.

And Alex is my friend. Isn't he?

I quietly groan and flick my eyes back up to look at the clock. The bell should ring any moment now...

I keep my gaze locked on the minute hand and painstakingly watch it tick forward.

I feel like killing myself with how slow the passage of time moves around me, so much so that by the time the bell actually rings, I'm so worn out by the anticipation that I'm the last one out the door.

That's when I remember what I have next. Home Economics. With everyone that's been causing me grief the past few days.

Alex, Quinn, Mason, Charity and I all in one room.